Memetic Me
by Morta's Priest
Summary: Meme /miːm/ (noun): an element of a culture or system of behavior passed from one individual to another by imitation or other non-genetic means. Public Relations, Taylor Hebert decided, would save the world. Right after she stopped being a weird super-hobo that made everyone hate her on principle. And after she figured out who the hell she truly was, or even wanted to be...
1. Rumors 1 - 4

**Rumors 1.1 - My Weakness**

People liked to talk, and whisper. Gossip spread like wildfire, traversing the world in an instant. Before the ground has stopped shaking in Peru, people in China knew about the earthquake, and vice versa. In the modern world, there was nothing that travelled faster than a good story.

Or a good lie.

Rumours and insinuations were more seductive than the truth, and unconstrained by mere reality. They could be… mighty. The poison-tipped pen was stronger than the sharpest sword.

I wasn't normal, and I hadn't been for a long time. Physically, I was the same I'd always been, fairly tall for my age and lanky, with all the awkwardness of being a teenager and few of the features. My hair, once my favorite, now hung in disorganized tangles across a face that didn't stand out from the crowd - except, perhaps, for a too-wide mouth. Not that I'd cared about such things - because the _inside _was a lot more screwed up than the outside could ever be. The words and whispers of others had crawled under my skin, and settled there to stay.

I was weak. Harmless. Broken_. _I'd heard all those things before from the lips of my tormentors, and for the longest time I'd refused to listen to them. I'd been convinced they were wrong, that they were just trying to get a rise out of me. But - no matter their twisted intent, their pointless antagonism, I knew there was a kernel of truth there. And that _hurt._

There was only one certainty in my life, and that was _school_. And school was _hell. _I dragged myself there with little more than rote repetition driving me onwards. I kept going just because change might be painful, or because I couldn't face the future. I wasn't sure. Some days, it felt like I only caught up with myself when I was finally walking home again.

I still don't know why everything became_ too much_. Why I couldn't handle on Tuesday what I'd survived on Monday. I just knew that I'd locked myself away in the bathroom in desperation, crying as silently as I could manage, all the while attempting to stop. I didn't even care to get up the next morning, staring blankly at the ceiling until Dad came to check up on me. I don't know if I'd ever gotten up if not for him. It felt like I was dead, but still moving.

I had many reasons to be despondent, but at the core of things were just three people. Three bullies who refused to back down, seemingly intent on ruining my life. I hoped beyond hope that they would give up, get bored and move on - but they never did. I don't think even they knew why they were still at it. It was just the way of things, now.

A few weeks after I'd stopped reacting to their hateful words, the trio caught me after school. Not content with my glum silence, they'd shoved me into a dumpster on the side of the road to let me stew in the garbage 'where I belonged'. It was, perhaps, to echo their prank from January, when I'd spent several disgusting hours in my own locker. The dumpster had been mercifully empty, though it was suffused with a ghastly stench which wouldn't wash off for days and seeped into my clothes and skin. I'd scrubbed myself raw to get rid of the taint, but it didn't help against my mind's little games.

Even while I was down in that dump, though, I hadn't been able to really blame the trio - not anymore. Madison had looked downright uncomfortable as she closed the lid. Emma was urging the others on, but her eyes were empty. Sophia just seemed bored. They were going through the motions. In their own ways, they were as stuck as I was. Caught in repetition.

Those three were a symptom of a greater problem. They were just a few especially rotten apples in a spoiled batch. The trio had done what many others spoke about, but never dared to act upon - they lashed out at the outsider in their midst. Theirs was a primal reaction, one that they might not even fully understand. A reaction not to me specifically, but to something I represented - weakness in all its forms, perhaps.

I'd heard all the lies before, the nonsense people told each other to cover up their own insecurities, their own failings. "Taylor's such a loser..." they muttered just loud enough for me to hear, often in far more vulgar terms, trying to reassure their peers of their worth. "She won't ever stand up for herself…" they claimed, safely ensconced in their restrictive group and its rules, unable to rebel against the rules. "I hear she cries herself to sleep and can't even _talk _to people normally! Emma told me that she's a sociopath or something," they repeated, not allowed to show the wrong emotions for fear of public ridicule.

They were stuck, and I was their scapegoat. I - could live with that. But I couldn't live among them.

I skipped weeks of school, unwilling to return as if nothing had happened, because the trio wouldn't like my lack of fear, my acceptance of things which they reviled so instinctually. I tried to distract myself from the disaster that was my life, wandering the Boardwalk because I couldn't face going home. People still whispered around me, of course, but they weren't actively _malicious. _Among strangers, I could disappear.

"For once, can't you all just shut up," I whispered under my breath, rubbing my forehead as it rang like a drum, the result of a stress headache that I'd felt coming for hours. I sat down along a stretch of blank wall on the Boardwalk, staring out over the distant harbor, content to just ignore everything for a while. It was calm there, silent. Lonely. "There we go..." I hummed.

The voices faded as the early evening crept up on the city, and the street emptied. I thought of Dad, and his tired face whenever he came home from a long day of work, his compassionate but helpless pleas to the school board. He was the one rock I still had left in the stormy sea. Some days, the only thing that kept me going was his encouragement, his kind gestures.

I had almost convinced myself to go home, to face him, when someone sat down next to me.

"Hey there, sourpuss," the girl said lightly, her piercing green eyes meeting mine. "You seem glum."

* * *

**Rumors 1.2 - My Friend**

Someone - was talking to me. What the hell?

The girl's dirty blonde hair stood out over her black vest and rather smudgy pants, but I was especially caught by the bright green of her expressive eyes. "You've had a rough couple weeks, haven't you?" she added after a moment, her gaze betraying discomfort. "I saw you around town last wednesday, you know. I wanted to say something then and there, but things got kind of hectic..."

Right, I knew what she meant, now. That had been when a bunch of villains raided a bank in plain view of the street, barely a block away from where I'd been. I'd been tempted to snoop, in case any of the Wards showed up to beat up the crooks, but I'd resisted the urge. I coloured at the thought, looking away from the stranger. Why would a complete stranger come up to me in the street just to remind me of a cape fight I wasn't even present for? I glanced at her worriedly, and familiar thoughts occurred to me. Familiar fears. _Does she know about me?_

"You don't have to worry too much, I'm not some creepy stalker girl," the creepy stalker girl promised as she raised her hands in mock-surrender, a grin curling around her mouth. "Call me Lisa. I live nearby, you could say…" She waved vaguely towards the end of the street. "Well, at least I'm around these parts often enough. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm ready to serve. I'll have you know that I'm a very good listener. And talker, obviously."

No kidding. "...I'm Taylor." I wasn't sure what to say after that, uncomfortable at having someone pay so much attention to me. At the same time, I was inordinately relieved that _someone was paying attention to me. _"I guess that would be nice..." I added noncommittally.

"That's great!" Lisa proclaimed, looking at me again with that intense gaze. "They did do a number on you, didn't they?" she wondered. "I got a feeling that you were in a bad place, but I can see that it's a little worse than I thought..." She leaned rather far into my comfort zone. "The bastards will _pay_, you know. Sooner or later. I'll even help, if you need me to."

The last time I'd tried to get help, I'd been burned - badly. "Ah…" I hesitated, cringing slightly at a sudden realization of what she'd said. She obviously knew things about me - enough to be _dangerous. _Had the rumours about me spread into the city already? Was I the pariah of the whole of Brockton Bay, now? The thought chilled my bones, and my breath caught in horror.

Lisa grasped my shaking arm firmly. "You don't have to panic. I'm just really _insightful_," she explained, narrowing her eyes as I stared at her. "And you're just hiding in that shell of yours, aren't you?" she wondered. "I've seen this before - people that just sort of fold in on themselves after taking a lot of abuse. It tends to take a good shock to the system to get them back out of their funk." She murmured something under breath, too low to hear, before grimacing. "Not that I'm going to do that to you, of course. I'm not that heartless."

"Who exactly _are _you?" I demanded desperately, looking down at her hand which still kept my arm in place. "Wh…?" I couldn't even complete the thought. What would I ask? Why are you being so cruel? What gives you the right to be so insightful_? _Why are you paying attention to a weakling like me?

"I remember introducing myself, so you know who I am," Lisa said snootily, clearly encouraged that I wasn't brushing her off. "I'm just someone who's concerned for other people, that's all. Well, I care for _some _people, not others." She frowned at that. "I'm sure we both know a few who could use a good spiked boot to the face."

Hah - humor. Glumly I imagined stomping all over the faces of my nemeses, and it was a little disconcerting how utterly empty of feeling the image left me. Defeating symptoms of the disease just felt pointless. "I suppose," I admitted ruefully, knowing that's the answer Lisa expected. "I guess I can relate."

Lisa nodded, laying her arm across my shoulders as if we'd known each other for years. "You have to know there's more to life than assholes and crappy schoolwork," she whispered as if it were a great secret. "You can _live!_ For example… I like to hang out my friends when I'm not working, and even when I _am _working, they're never very far away. I have hobbies, I like puzzles, that sort of thing…" She waved her hand, shrugging. "I do stuff."

I just sighed. _Friends_._ A life._ _It would be nice to have those._

"Hm. Clearly we've got a lot of work to do," Lisa murmured under her breath. "I could use some more friends, and clearly you're looking for some too. I can talk for both of us if that's necessary. It's perfect!" She held out her free hand. "So, friends?"

Her smile seemed so very genuine that I couldn't say no to something so freely offered. Not just because Lisa was fast-talking, easy-going and generally reminded me of so many things I had lost sight of, but because I knew I couldn't turn down a helping hand, and this was the first one I had been offered all year. Still - I didn't know a thing about her.

So be it. Tabula Rasa, and hope that I don't get burned again.

"Alright." I smiled hesitantly, and it came out _right _for the first time in ages_. _I grasped her hand and she squeezed firmly. "Friends."

Lisa's grin grew wider, and a vague sense of unease seemed to lift from her expression. She pulled me upright, and I hadn't quite caught my balance before she grasped my arm again in a tighter hold than before, and pulled me with her. "Friends share drinks and stuff, right?" she inquired lightly as she tapped her chin as she glanced back. "I think I know a nice place around here, not too out in the open… I've been there often..."

I was too surprised to protest, and let myself get pulled along by Lisa's whirlwind enthusiasm. It was a far cry better from anything else I could be doing with my time, and she probably knew that. We rushed down the Boardwalk, past a few rather mean-looking guards who kept the peace, and we walked by half a dozen perfectly serviceable restaurants. Lisa finally dragged me into a rather poorly-lit pub, dropped me down at a table, and put her feet as she crashed into her own seat. There weren't any people around except the staff, thankfully.

"You're… sort of forward," I noted, a little frazzled, as I looked around the place. I'd never been to this particular bar, as it had always looked grungy from the outside. Inside, it was at least clean, if rather old-timey. A young waitress with a rather mousy haircut was already heading our way.

"It's a nice spot, right? I come here sometimes when I want to take a breather," Lisa said before I could ask. "They know my order, obviously. I assume you'd be fine with tea as well."

"...Sure."

Lisa smirked. "Don't worry. Dragging people in here is a bad habit of mine." She took a steaming cup of tea from the waitress, and a second cup was put in front of me. I had to admit - it did smell heavenly. Lisa snickered at my reaction, sipping eagerly from her own. "I don't really think assertiveness is a bad character trait, but opinions differ. There's plenty of introverts around to balance me out," she added solemnly, raising an eyebrow. "Case in point, I believe."

I grimaced at that. "...I guess."

The blonde nodded. "We'll have to work on the whole 'woman of few words' thing, but I know a few approaches that might get you out of your shell," she declared, looking out towards the harbor through the smudgy window. "This demure thing might be endearing to some people, I'm sure, but it's kind of unhealthy. After all, I'm fairly certain this is not your natural style."

I stared at her blankly. "How...?"

"How do I know that?" She shrugged. "Call it intuition. People can change, but it doesn't tend to be terribly healthy when it's sudden. Pardon me, but you don't come across as someone who should be meek and introverted - it just feels so wrong. This whole thing…" She waved at me vaguely, her eyes gleaming. "It's major-league weirdness. _My _kind of weirdness."

I wasn't sure what she was implying with that statement, but I nodded along. It wasn't the first time someone had told me I had changed, or looked at me funny. My dad had made his worries known before, but he'd stopped talking about my attitude back when he visited the school over the locker incident. I knew I was more fearful these days, more withdrawn - but who wouldn't be after all that happened?

I was _weak, _after all...

"So, now what?" I wondered uneasily, glancing away from Lisa's smile. "I'm not very good at friends."

Lisa raised an eyebrow. "Eh, we'll see. Nothing has to change if you don't want it to." She paused, frowning. "You know what? This is a decent enough place to hang for a bit, so why don't you come here whenever things get too crazy? Give me a call, and odds are I'll be around to talk. Nobody here cares two bits about some teenagers, so it's a good neutral ground."

I didn't answer immediately, hesitating.

Lisa smiled wryly, shaking her head. "Besides, we're within walking distance of some pretty good second-hand clothing shops here - I'm positive we can scrounge up something nice in there. What do you say to _that?_"

God, _shopping_. When was the last time…?

"I thought so," Lisa muttered smugly. "Clearly you've been missing out on the good life! I'll have to change that." She drank her tea, sinking into her chair. "Maybe we have some more things to talk about, too? I play a great game of chess, I'm told, and I've got a few good books I want to finish up. Plus, like anyone, I've got my weird obsessions." She made a little mock salute, smirking. "Certified cape fanatic, reporting for duty."

I swallowed thickly. "_Capes_, huh?"

Parahumans, heroes and villains, the Protectorate - once, I had lived for that stuff. I'd read the magazines religiously, watching every crappy documentary I could. Dozens of books were still stashed in my closet at home, most of them about the early days of parahumans, and my one-time favourite, Alexandria. I hadn't really thought about all that for a while, but for a chunk of my early life, capes had been pure _awesome_.

"I… know a few things about them, I guess," I admitted.

Lisa's smile was practically manic at that point. "You managed a full sentence there, so that must mean it's more than a _bit. _I'm sure of it_. _Fess up, you're a total geek too."

No sense in lying, even if I was rusty at this stuff. "...Yeah."

She nodded confidently. "Right! Well, that settles it, then. You like capes, I like capes - we have _so much_ in common!" She rolled her eyes at her own silliness, tapping her chin again. "You know what? I have some stuff lying around at home that you might like. A bit of research, a bit of speculation on my part. I want to see what you make of it. I have an inkling it might be fun." She raised an eyebrow. "Interested?"

I couldn't keep my own smile, tiny as it was, from making it through. "Yeah," I managed. "That sounds good."

It really did, and that was _amazing._

* * *

**Interlude 1 - Tattletale**

Lisa strolled into the red brick factory without even trying to be silent, listening for the growls of Rachel's dogs, just in case. The lower rooms were dark, the moonlight barely creeping through the dusty windows near the ceiling as she made her way to the back, passing by huge machines covered in tarps and sheets. Once upon a time, this place had been used for something_, _but_... _

She shivered, the stinging edge of a headache already too close to the surface for comfort. Pacing herself, even now, could be difficult. A nap would be good.

"You're awfully late," a familiar voice spoke from the dark, and Lisa paused for a moment. Brian stepped from the shadows between the old machines. "I figured you'd show up eventually. The others were sure you'd bailed, actually. Rachel took off in a huff a while ago."

"Right. As if she needed an excuse," Lisa murmured tiredly. A small smile made its way onto her face nevertheless. "I have a good excuse, though - I was busy! I think you'll like what I'm up to, and I thought I could blow movie night for something important. This wasn't exactly a _job, _after all.._._"

Brian shifted slightly. "Now you made me curious. Do tell."

"It's nothing much, really. I just made a new friend," Lisa explained, her eyes gleaming knowingly. "She's an interesting sort - the same girl I got wiggy about last week. Funny how that happens."

"You sought her out, then?" Brian wondered, frowning. "You're not saying…?"

Lisa nodded, holding off on using her power. She needed _more, _and she wouldn't get it tonight_. _"I'm pretty sure I'm right, yeah - still fuzzy on the details. You know this is my area of expertise, though. The boss might not be too enthusiastic about my extracurricular activities, but as long as I'm keeping it outside working hours, things should be fine." She shrugged. "I have a little something to try out first, anyway. Call it an audition."

"You should discuss potential hires with everyone," Brian said warningly. "Besides, something tells me your _friend _wasn't wearing tights - and neither were you. Do you _want _to get in trouble?"

"Eh, I'm not helpless," Lisa noted. "Anyway, she needed my help, so I didn't really see a better alternative. I'm not going to force the issue, obviously." She crossed her arms. "Besides, you tend to trust my instincts when your life's in danger, so why not trust me on this? Do you honestly think I'll fuck up?"

"That's not…" Brian rubbed his forehead. "You _know _Rachel will freak about a recruit. You remember how things went with Spitfire? Or Circus?"

"This isn't the same. Besides, _I _wasn't the one who messed it up with Spitfire," Lisa remarked dryly. "Unfortunately, right now I think Rachel's _dogs _wouldn't defer to this one, so a meet-and-greet is out of the question. Give this amateur psychotherapist a few sessions, and I'll see what I can do about that." She wiggled her fingers and grinned. "Some caring ears, a little bit of Thinker magic, and we just might get something neat…"

Brian groaned despairingly. "Figures you'd find another _weird _one. Does she have a name?"

Lisa rolled her eyes. "Everyone has a name, silly." She wagged her finger. "And no, I don't think so. Anyway, I'm going to keep this one separate from the rest of the group, since it's too soon to call. I need more data." She paused. "But if you must, you can call her…" She shrugged. "Amalgam."

"...Yeah, _that's _not cryptic at all," Brian muttered. "Is she any good?"

"You know me," Lisa said lightly, grinning. "She'll be the best."

* * *

**Rumors 1.3 - My Inspiration**

It was a given that I would visit Lisa again, and I did so just a few days after our first run-in. I returned to that same dingy little pub where we'd shared a drink, certain that for a few hours I could ignore a lot of the usual crap of my life, and be myself - after a fashion. Shy, conservative with words, and on the paranoid side - but not completely miserable.

Lisa saw right through me as I sank into a chair, and she smiled with a sort of sad understanding that only dad could match. It was amazing to realize just how much I had missed sharing a word or two with someone who didn't look at me with pity or worry, and my new friend's dark expression from the first day didn't return - she was bright and enthusiastic throughout, obviously quite intent to keep things light. My mood lifted with hers, enjoying the positive moment in a dreary _always,_ and it was the first time in months that I felt like things could genuinely get better.

Honestly, it couldn't get much worse.

True to her word, Lisa had brought some things for me to look over; a whole stack of them, in fact. I didn't quite know what I had expected to receive, but what I got was _stunning_ with a side-order of amazing. Apparently Lisa had compiled a truly massive collection of random information about all sorts of capes, ranging from their height and favourite food all the way to details on their powers, and everything in between_. _

I had never seen anything quite like it, and though the disorganized mess could clearly use a lot of work in terms of structuring, there was a masterwork hidden in there - I could almost see it.

Perhaps it was because she was my only friend, but I carried that particular thought rather further than I might have done otherwise. One idea kept prodding at me in the silent hours, urging me to do something about it, and I'd caved soon enough. My body protested against the sleepless nights, but I weathered them because I had a _friend _again_, _and I wasn't going to let her down.

Lisa hadn't even asked for anything in particular, but I couldn't very well give all her carefully collected information back without comment, so I set off to do a little annotating. By reading her work and doing something with it, I decided, she would see that I was worthy of such a gift. It was an incredibly unhealthy way to look at a friendship, but it worked for me. I was enthusiastic about something again, and that was all that really mattered!

My self-appointed work was not easy. When I finally got all the way through Lisa's poorly formatted notations, after hours of puzzling and scratching my head, I was honestly _intrigued _by what all that I'd found_. _Many of the notations were short or almost nonsensical and they jumped from tangent to tangent with intermediate steps missing altogether, but there was some _system _there, nevertheless. The confusion might have discouraged me, if note for the few bits I _did _understand. The cape geek in me was giddy with excitement at every complicated theory she'd jotted down about obscure capes from far-off places, every list of tinker gadgets and sketch of suits and uniforms, and they all made me want to figure out the missing pieces that she'd left out. Hundreds of faces and names were missing from the collection, but there was a _lot _of information present that I'd never read before, spread across dozens of subjects.

This was every cape geek's dream, I knew. Lisa's collection was a labor of love, completely hand-written across what had to be months or years, slowly added to whenever something new came came up, amended to fix mistakes. It was a fanatic's bible. And Lisa had given it away without a second thought. To me. To someone she met only days before. A perfect stranger.

That… that was pretty _awesome._

I didn't return to visit Lisa the next week, but not for lack of caring - instead, I spent more and more time at home, engaged in my self-appointed mission to the exclusion of almost everything else. I was far too busy for distractions. I slaved away on a half-formed concept that took shape even as I typed away. Caught up in long-abandoned interests that burned anew, I barely even left my room, and school was an afterthought. Between my books and the internet, I had my hands more than full.

It took me two weeks to turn part of Lisa's disjointed mess of inferences into something coherent, something of a rough narrative. The shapeless blob of hypotheses now had an actual structure with a beginning, middle, and end - it was getting somewhere. I had never been particularly brilliant at English Literature, but that didn't really matter - I wasn't writing for a Pulitzer. The manuscript was thirty-seven pages long, black on white, and I'd printed it using the rickety old printer that my dad hadn't used in ages. The ink was still drying as I picked up the first few sections, and while there were intermittent white lines across them that signified ink was running out, everything was legible and present. It was finally _done!_

_'Mind Games', _I called it, _'A History and Exploration of Thinker Capes.'_ That was a topic which Lisa's notes had covered very extensively, though I had barely known two things about before I opened up her complicated treasure trove of information. It was the natural first choice to work on, and it admittedly felt amazing to enjoy _learning _after the disaster that was school. Almost every theory that Lisa had offered made it into the paper - and some of my own, constructed from the information I'd analyzed myself.

She _had _to like it, I decided, more confident than I'd felt in months. I picked up my phone, calling Lisa for the first time in nearly two weeks, and it took a long while for her to pick up. Finally, just before I was going to hang up, her voice resounded across the line - sleepy, disoriented. What was she doing, napping in the middle of the afternoon?

"_Wuzzah?"_

"It's me," I answered nervously.

_"Taylor!"_ Lisa called, and she sounded clear awake, now._ "You're - you want to meet? Right?"_

I bit my lip. "...Yeah. When?"

"_It's… That's good! Great!"_ Lisa proclaimed. "_This is kind of_ _inconvenient - but well, never mind that. You are probably more important. Yeah - yeah. Definitely more important. I'll be at the usual spot in half an hour!_" She hung up.

I just stared at my phone for a moment, incredulous. Lisa clearly hadn't expected me to call back at all, as she sounded downright stunned at my call. Still - the enthusiasm in her voice had been obvious, and I smiled to myself at the fact that someone _cared._

"Taylor?" a voice asked, and I froze for an instant before recognizing it. "Are you alright?"

I glanced to the door of my room, realizing distantly that I'd forgotten to close it, too caught up in my rediscovered hobby to pay attention. My dad was standing there, looking at the freshly printed pages in my hands with an odd expression of disbelief. I wondered how long he'd been there. Had he seen my little conversation?

"...Hi dad," was all I managed. I hadn't really spoken to him in days, it seemed. I saw him in the morning, of course, but he was usually gone before I was properly awake, and I would have locked myself in my room by the time he came back. I was pretty sure he knew I wasn't going to school regularly - but he hadn't mentioned that at all. What could I say, now?

"You look - _better_," my dad said after a long moment, stepping into the room hesitantly, as if he expected me to toss him out at any moment. He glanced around, perhaps surprised that I hadn't let it turn into a pigsty, and nodded to himself. "I was worried you were… I don't know what I thought. Stupid things. Could be anything in this city." He focused on the papers I'd reflexively pressed to my chest. "I wondered what you were doing… I see you've been busy."

"...Yeah." I shifted a little to show him the gift I'd typed up. "It's for… I think I made a friend."

"A friend, huh?" My dad's eyes seemed to light up behind his thick glasses, and some of the lines on his face seemed to vanish. "Really? That's wonderful!" He glanced down at my hands again, brow furrowing as he glanced at the title page of my article. "Capes? You met this friend of yours on the internet, I take it?"

"Her name's Lisa," I blurted in response, wondering if I should disabuse him of the notion, and tell him about our little meetings. I wrestled with my tongue, but explanations were beyond me. "She's… nice," I managed. I wanted to say something more, but I couldn't get the words out even as I tried. It was as if they vanished halfway between my brain and my mouth, suddenly dropping into the ether. I concentrated, getting a little angry with myself at my failure, although I had learned to expect it. "She's not from school," I added at last, halfway towards a decent explanation.

"I see." Dad seemed to understand the subtext, nodding sadly as he looked away. "I suppose that's why you've been skipping classes again, huh?" he observed. "I wish there were alternatives to the situation, Taylor. I wish I knew…" He stopped again, and I thought I saw tears in his eyes for an instant. "After January - I've been trying to get something arranged, but it's…"

"I know..." I whispered. I did understand - between the school's utter lack of sympathy and Emma's dad, there weren't many options to consider. We didn't have the money for a better school, and dad had trouble enough keeping his job without having to throw my education around.

"Just... just do what you think is right, and I'll handle the fallout, alright?" dad said slowly, eyes downcast. "We'll see if there's options when Summer vacation comes around. Until then, just act responsibly, and we'll get through this. We always have."

"Yeah." I looked away. "Of course."

"Taylor…" He looked at me again with that conflicted gaze, that tangible uncertainty. "You know I'll always love you, right? No matter what you -" He grimaced as he cut himself off. "No matter who you are inside."

"...I know that, dad." Now there were tears in _my _eyes. Why was he getting all emotional, now of all times? Why was I? "I… I'm gonna go out for a while…" I murmured, mortified. "Alright?"

Dad narrowed his eyes for a brief moment, perhaps realizing my attempt to flee the situation, then nodded mechanically. "Alright - if that's what you need to do. But… be careful out there, and be ready - take your pepper spray with you. And remember that you shouldn't trust _anyone._" He took another deep, shuddering breath as he gestured to the door. "Stay safe."

I agreed distractedly, stuffing my article into a bag under dad's watchful eyes. "Later, dad," I murmured as I passed him at the door. "I'll be at dinner."

He nodded, and his smile mirrored my own. Things weren't perfect - but we managed.

We always did.

* * *

**Rumors 1.4 - My Gift**

I got to the little pub off the Boardwalk in record time, unable to shake the talk with my dad from my mind, or forget that strange look in his eyes. I was tempted to go back, to try and explain what was going on in my life, but the very thought of it seemed to constrict my throat - I couldn't handle that. Not yet. I glanced to the pack of paper under my arm, my little gift for Lisa, and tried to gather my courage, such as it was.

The bar was, as ever, devoid of much life. I suspected that it would get busier later at night, but while the sun was up the pub might as well be a ghost town for all the regulars it had. Well - this wasn't my first time here, though, so by some definitions I'm sure _I _counted as a regular. That thought was confirmed when the waitress looked up from reading something, and smiled in recognition. I nodded at her as I headed for my usual seat.

I halted in the middle of my step. Lisa was already present, of course, hands behind her head as she leaned against the wall, her chair balancing precariously on two legs. She wasn't the one that surprised me, though. That would be her _neighbour. _Hanging limply on his own chair, a boy my age was looking at Lisa with a vaguely annoyed expression, his mop of black curls almost covering his eyes in their shade, the white hood of his vest hiding the rest of his face from view. I'd only been there for a few seconds when his light blue eyes turned to me without a hint of surprise.

"Look who's here," the boy said without even looking at Lisa. "Of course you'd run all the way here, just to prove _her _right…"

"Told you she'd be quick," Lisa replied smugly, her smile broadening. "And you wouldn't believe I made an actual friend, would you? You honestly should know better. The house always wins."

"Har har."

Hesitantly, I stepped closer, clutching my bag to the chest as I glanced from one to the other. Noting Lisa's amusement, my gaze slipped back to _him. _My confusion was clearly written all over my face, as Lisa snorted in amusement.

"Don't mind this idiot," she noted, winking. "I was in the middle of something when you called, and he got overly curious…" Hadn't she been _sleeping? _"Anyway, I couldn't get him to let sleeping dogs lie, so..." She sighed. "Taylor - this lump here is Alec. We work together, sort of. He's nice enough, most of the time."

"You shower me with faint praise," Alec said as he looked me over. I tried for a smile, but my nervousness was evidently clearly visible. "Nice to meet you."

"...Sure," I answered. "Same."

An awkward silence followed.

Lisa tapped on the chair next to her, cocking her head to the side curiously. "Don't worry, I'll make sure he won't bite. Much, anyway."

Alec snorted. "Please, what kind of person do you think I am? I leave that kind of stuff to Rachel."

I didn't know quite what to say to the quibbling pair, but I wasn't going to run before I'd given Lisa what I'd made. Slipping into the seat next to her, as far away from the boy as possible, I tried not to look too uncomfortable. I didn't have a very good track record with guys - especially not handsome ones - though Alec probably counted as more _pretty_. Italian descent, I figured.

"Well, look at that. She's shaking like a leaf," Alec murmured, and I felt myself color despite myself, grasping for the cup of tea that Lisa must've ordered before I even arrived. "You sure know how to pick 'em, Lisa…"

"Don't be a dick," she deadpanned. "You had to butt your nose into things for no reason. I told you that there were… issues to work through."

"I had a perfectly legitimate interest," Alec protested.

"I'm sure you did, in your weird little mind." Lisa rolled her eyes as she focused on me again. "You alright there, Taylor? You look - better than last time, actually." She blinked. "That's kind of unexpected. No offense."

I nodded slowly, looking down at my glass. "I guess…"

"Still a bit of a mute, though," Lisa observed lightly. "But you've been _busy, _haven't you?" She cocked her head to the side. "You know, after last time, I was afraid you were going to try something - troubling. You didn't call, didn't pick up the phone… You fell off the grid. I've been thinking about tracking you down."

Though her suggestion hurt, I smiled at her genuine concern, and nodded. "I _was _busy," I agreed, fumbling hurriedly for my bag, removing _Mind Games _from in between the pages of a heavy book that prevented it from getting too crumpled on the way over. "I made this," I said lamely as I put it on the table. "It's… for you."

"For me_, _huh?" Lisa's brow furrowed momentarily as she took my article, and she glanced to it and back with that penetrating gaze of hers. It seemed like it could cut through bone. "Mind Games?" she mouthed, eyebrows raised. "A history of _thinker _capes."

"What?" Alec asked, glancing over. "Did you just say -"

"Yeah. It's based on something I gave her. My notes," Lisa said shortly, flipping through my gift, glancing over the text with narrowed eyes. "I figured that maybe if someone else could understand my notations, someone clever. I had a hunch…" She looked up. "This is… excellent stuff. You _processed _what I gave you, that much is obvious - certainly no amateur hijinks. Especially given _I _have trouble deciphering half the stuff I wrote in the past..."

"I…" What could I say? The words wouldn't even come to mind. "...Thanks?"

"You told me you were a cape geek - but this is just _cool." _Lisa paused, looking over my creation with suspicious eyes. "How _did _you figure out all this thinker-related stuff? I'm fairly sure I left it in bits and pieces. Out of everything, that had to have been one of my more scatterbrained topics."

I shrugged helplessly.

Lisa sighed laboriously. "Yeah, I figured this talking thing would be a problem," she complained as she leaned over. "Communication is important - and I can tell that you're struggling in there. You're tensing up, you're frustrated with yourself, but you can't quite break through this - facade of yours." She nodded. "It's involuntarily - or at the very least, you can't figure it out from the inside..."

Alec sighed. "_Why _are you bothering with this, Lisa?_"_

"Because I'm not an _asshole_," she shot back, glaring. "You of all people should know why it's important to get a handle on these sorts of - _emotional _problems. I don't care about what comes after all this, let's just act as decent human beings in the interim." She looked down at _Mind Games. _"Besides, I have a feeling that this… this means something. An important clue, I think, though clearly not enough to work from yet."

"You think that is _important?_" Alec asked acerbically, glaring from under his curls, his gaze never wandering from mine. "You think this - this _dishrag _of a girl is important? I know you've had some strange friends, but this one takes the cake." He sniffed. "This _weakling..._"

The words didn't hurt, really - I'd grown numb to them long ago - but a feeling of intense disappointment bubbled up from inside. I wasn't sure if I was disappointed with _him, _or the screwed-up world we shared, or at the fact that I'd gotten my hopes up.

Lisa, though, stared at Alec as if he'd just grown antlers. "_What_ did you just say?"

"You heard me. Why are we even here?" Alec asked, glowering. "We both have better things to do than hang out with depressed failures like her, don't we?" He moved to get up, still glaring at me, and Lisa joined him - only to slap him on the cheek. _Hard. _The sound seemed to echo in the small establishment, and I could only stare at the frozen moment.

After what seemed like ages, Alec rubbed his face, blinking. "Ow, what the hell, Lisa…?"

"Did you listen to yourself just now?" Lisa demanded, still standing opposite him, her hand quivering from the slap. "Did you even know what you were saying? God, here I've been trying not to _screw this up_, and you just waltz in and - " she paused, and her incensed expression made way for something else - something curious and terrible. Her gaze slowly moved back to me, eyes wide. "Oh. _Oh._"

"Lisa…?" Alec blinked slowly, following her gaze to me. After a long moment, his breath hitched - and then he paled. "Oh, _fuck. _You're not saying she's got _that?_"

"Don't talk about it in here," Lisa hissed, glancing to the waitress. "Too public,"she added, snapping up my article, and before I knew it she'd grabbed my arm and dragged me away - a gesture that was all too familiar already. Alec followed swiftly, dropping a fiver at the bar without even looking twice. I tried to struggle against her iron grip - but my feet wouldn't stop, and all I managed was a tremble.

Lisa didn't head onto the Boardwalk proper. Instead, she dragged me into one of the back alleys, where rust and decay popped up out of nowhere only a short distance from the clean streets. Behind the thin veneer of the city's main thoroughfares things were dirty and old, and I stared at the crumbling buildings as we passed them by. I'd never been here - I'd never even _seen _these places. Dad wouldn't have allowed it, either.

"Just bear with me for a while," Lisa noted, and I wasn't sure who she was addressing as she turned into a side corner. It was only then that I realized Alec was well behind us - was that comment aimed at _me?_ "We'll be there soon, no worries."

We dived through two, three partially blocked side-streets, into some kind of industrial area that had been abandoned ages ago. Our haphazard journey ended as Lisa kicked open the rotten door to a particularly worn building, its windows caked with dust and its roof rotting away. The inside smelt terrible, and I had to gag - I didn't have time to complain, though, as I was led down the stairs and into the cellar.

The utterly clean, well-stocked cellar. The wallpaper was old and discolored, but the place was in remarkably good condition given the rest of the house. _What the hell?_

"Isn't this one of _his _places?" Alec asked nervously as he entered behind us, closing the door to the upper level. "Should we be in here at all?"

"It's fine. I wouldn't have gotten an address if we couldn't use it," Lisa said in response, glancing around. "There hasn't been anyone here in at least a month or two, and it'll be that way for at least a few more weeks. It's a bit dusty - but we'll manage." She grabbed a lawnchair from the corner of the room, and dumped me on it without fanfare. "_Stay here_."

What was I, a _dog_? A surge of anger tried to break out, and I meant to speak up, to flip out - but I couldn't do it. A meek 'Okay,' was all that came out of my mouth. _Damn it. What the hell do I _do? All my anger was reduced to useless echoes in my skull.

"I know you're very pissed off right now," Lisa murmured almost to herself, frowning as she put down two more plastic chairs, the only ones available. "And on other days, I'm pretty sure you'd be scratching my eyes out - but there's progress there. Two weeks ago I couldn't even tell the real _you _was in there…" She raised an eyebrow. "Given your current predicament, I think a _cure _is worth a little manhandling, right? Trust me, we mean well."

She was talking about a - a cure. For _what? _For my _weakness?_

"Lisa…" Alec spoke up warningly. "You know what we just did, right? We can't just go around kidnapping people off the street, not to mention doing whatever the hell it is you're planning…" He sighed. "Don't tell me. It's going to be nuts and everyone's going to flip out when they hear about it, right? That seems like you."

"Nah. I'm planning nothing important," Lisa responded mildly. She stuck up two fingers in a peace sign as she turned back to me. "Hey there, Taylor. I'm Lisa - but you can also call me Tattletale. I'm a cape, surprise!"

_"Lisa, stop!" _Alec snapped. "What do you think -"

"The mouthy bastard is Regent," she continued undaunted, as if her words were about mundanities like the weather, rather than about _parahumans._ "He's got powers too, obviously. Don't spread it around."

Capes - Lisa and Alec were _capes. _The idea didn't want to register for a long moment, even though the idea had crossed my mind, momentarily, when I was working on _Mind Games. _I'd written it off as too bizarre, too coincidental. I didn't know Alec, but Lisa was my friend _\- _someone who liked to hang out and talk, not someone like Alexandria or Miss Militia. She didn't come across as much of a fighter at all - she was more of a…

"_Thinker_," I whispered in recognition.

Alec - _Regent _let out a long sigh. "Goddamnit."

Lisa grinned at me. "Good deduction, though you had all the parts to solve this a while ago... Yes, I do indeed have a thinker power," Lisa agreed. "And unless I'm very mistaken - so do you."


	2. Rumors 5 - 6

**Rumors 1.5 - My Power**

"W-what?"

Lisa's words lingered as she smirked at me in self-satisfaction. "You heard me."

I did hear her. But what she claimed - made no sense to me. Why on earth would she think _I _had powers? And yet - she was a _cape. _She had a _secret hideout_, for crying out loud! If anyone was the authority on powers, it would have to be someone who had them, right?

I shuddered, gripping the hard plastic of the chair tightly. I wasn't sure when it had happened, but Lisa's arm was draped across my shoulders, a warm pressure against my neck, and I could practically feel her heartbeat, much more controlled than my own. It was of small comfort as I cringed back involuntarily from her touch.

If she was right - if I was in fact a parahuman, maybe _that _was the reason for everything that had gone wrong in my life, every horrible turn it had taken. Maybe I felt so different because I _was _different. Weren't there capes whose personality was affected by their power? I'd written about just such people barely a day or two ago. At that time, it had been just academic, distant. It didn't seem real, in a way.

_Powers - _maybe with those, I could get out of this death spiral. Maybe I could be strong.

That idea remained a perfect ray of hope for a long, shining moment, a vision of a bright costume, myself standing on a windy rooftop with Lisa besides me, facing the world. Then the reality of the situation crashed in, the real implications of what Lisa was trying to tell me. If I _did _have powers, I had never noticed them before now - or they were so spectacularly unhelpful that they put me where I ended up in the first place. Perhaps I shouldn't have been disappointed, but I was.

"Thinker, huh? Sure you're not thinking of Master classification?" I heard Alec ask Lisa as I stared at the floor, focusing on the dusty tiles just to keep my stomach from rebelling. I felt sickly, stuck somewhere between that moment of desperate hope and the perpetual pit of weakness that seemed to sap all my strength away.

"It's probably a bit of both," Lisa said pensively, and she squeezed my shoulder in reassurance. Reluctantly I edged back in my seat, trying to focus on her without thinking about the powers, the subterfuge. She was still Lisa - still my friend. "Taylor?" She asked softly. "God, you're in shock, aren't you? Or close enough…"

Shellshock, maybe.

"This can't continue," Lisa observed a moment later, narrowing her eyes as she did. "You weren't aware of your powers, so clearly it's not nearly as annoying as my own, or not in the same way. Now that you know it exists, does anything stick out at you? Anything you dismissed before? Something peculiar?"

I didn't even know what to say, or what to think. If I had powers, what would they feel like? I'd never heard of parahumans having too much trouble with their skills, and Lisa's research into thinker capes hadn't changed that impression either. Would it be like controlling another arm - something you can do automatically without knowing any of the intermediate steps? Or would it be like a prosthetic, something that took getting used to it, that you needed to practice? What _was _my power supposed to be, anyway?

"My - power," I said after a moment. "What is it?"

"She's clueless. There goes the easy route," Alec muttered lowly. He looked at me with sharp eyes. "To put it bluntly, you made me hate you. Really badly. It's almost as inconvenient a power as that one guy who could only animate poop. What did he go with? Sh-"

"_Alec," _Lisa snapped. "Let's not crack jokes at the traumatized girl, thank you!"

"It's okay," I broke in softly. I kind of liked his direct answer. "I make people _hate _me?" I asked, mortified. "Really?"

"I wasn't insulting anyone - just making an observation," Alec complained to Lisa, frowning. "Also, I don't think I'm under the influence right now, so the range has to be pretty limited - that's a blessing, I think. Mind if I…?" He looked at me, raising an eyebrow.

I nodded distractedly, still mulling over his words. That bizarre moment in the bar suddenly made sense, when he'd gone all _Emma_, but I didn't dare extrapolate from there. The very thought made me uneasy, as if I was dangling off a cliff.

"Can't wait to slap you again," Lisa said wryly. "It's the most fun I've had all day."

"Sadist."

She snorted. "Masochist."

They were _testing me, _I was sure. The worst part about that observation was that I couldn't protest with any strength - part of me was wrestling against the stifling blanket that I was under, that awful _weakness _that refused to give way. Still, something burned inside, sour and foul, a spark of the indignation I should've felt. And yet… what was the alternative?

"Here we go again," Alec murmured, edging forward gingerly as he kept his eyes on me. At first, nothing happened at all, and he let out a sigh, before taking another daring step. His gaze shifted minutely, and though he was still staring at me, he narrowed his eyes. His lip curled up into an expression of obvious distaste that lasted only a second or two before he blinked in confusion - and took a long step back.

Had _I _really just caused that? I'd seen the change, that moment of confusion before something _else _seemed to take over Alec's face - as if a demon crawled behind his eyes, a foul thing that _hated _me like nothing else. Was that what my power was like? Was I such a crappy person that even when I got superpowers, they _actively hated me?_

"That feels pretty terrible," Alec complained as he rubbed his arms as if cold. "It's… hard to describe. Slick, like oil, but with a weird sort of high to it…"

"Seven feet, give or take?" Lisa noted distantly. "Bigger range than I thought - but still pretty limited. Point blank for combat purposes. If she were a Brute too, you'd have a hell of a punching bag, keeping the enemy busy..."

I glanced between them, aghast. _Combat _purposes? What did they think I was going to do? I wasn't a _fighter! _They had to see that!

"You are wrong about her power, "Alec noted as he leaned back against the door, and he seemed to be avoiding my eyes. "I don't think I'm resistant at all, so that rules out a few things. I only noticed what was going on because I was fully alert - and she still got into my head. Her power's insidious, stealthy. Not brute force." He looked at me again, though he didn't seem comfortable with that. "It was weaker, this time - I broke out on my own before I could really go all nutty. Did you do anything different? Did you feel something while that was happening?"

I just shook my head, a shiver running down my back.

Lisa rubbed her chin. "It has to be a factor of exposure - you were within her power's range for a few minutes the first time compared to a second or two," Lisa commented. "Whatever Taylor's really doing - it's not going to be noticed by people unless they know what to look out for. There's no telling what would happen with extended exposure. Maybe it'd stick?"

"That would be problematic," Alec muttered. "That brings up another point, though - _you, _Lisa. You've shown no signs of being affected - and you've been around her for hours."

"That's true…" Lisa trailed off, glancing at my shivering form with that strange intensity. "Alec acted as if he knew you while influenced by your power, even though you two had only just met. He even used insults that seemed to hit home, ones that I certainly didn't tell him about. That implies that your power informed him..." She paused, wincing. "Ow."

"You got something?"

Lisa nodded, rubbing the side of her head with a frown. "Yeah. She's doing more than just emotions - I think she's broadcasting her _self-image_."

Alec seemed to slump in on himself as he shook his head slowly. "Fuck, Lisa. That's…"

"Awful," she agreed easily. She smiled at me, seeming a little forced. "Don't worry - we'll figure this out together... I'm good at that sort of thing. Alec can serve as moral support. Sort of. As long as he stays like ten feet away from us." She paused. "That's generally a good rule of thumb with him, actually."

"Very funny."

I barely even listened to their attempt to reassure me - it was as if someone had poured ice in my veins. Lisa had said I'd been _broadcasting _my self-image onto people. That meant my confused inner world had been every bit as visible as the outside was, and I'd never even known. Every morning I went to school with reluctance, hoping that looking outwardly calm would help make things better… and it had all been pointless. I might as well have gone out there with a sign.

My power was freaking _super-depression. _Every waking moment I was dragging everyone else down _with me. _I would have screamed, if my mind didn't swallow it up halfway to my mouth. The whole world just seemed to - slide away, dripping away in greys and browns.

"Taylor?" Lisa asked, and she sought out my pulse. "She's alright - just a little overstressed, I think. Best to let her process..."

I must have fainted - or had a panic attack. Maybe both.

"There's a clinic not far from here," Alec said. "Maybe…?"

"It's not _medical,_" Lisa responded. "At least, not the kind of medicine that the corner store can practice. I'm getting jumbled signals - her power's hard at work to try and feed me a false image, but the real picture keeps shining through. It's not at all stealthy, now." She frowned, leaning forward. "My power is countering hers without me even knowing it. It sees through the little deceptions, and I'm just noticing what it's doing, now. Explains my immunity, I guess. It's probably why I've been getting headaches around her…"

The basement might as well not have existed, for all I cared at that moment. I was still stuck on my power, and how it made too much twisted sense. The phoned-in bullying at school wasn't just my imagination playing tricks on me; they were going through the motions, forced to do so by my parahuman ability. I'd been perpetuating my own misery!

They hadn't been punishing me for my weakness - I had been doing that _myself._

"My power's gone freaky in her presence before," Lisa said in the distance. "The first time we met, I was convinced she was simultaneously blissfully relaxed - and also _suicidally depressed. _That's what convinced me to follow up on your comment. It seemed to me like she was acting out a personality that she didn't actually have…"

"You're telling me this depression thing is acting_?" _Alec demanded. "It doesn't look like it!"

Lisa scoffed. "Don't take it that literally. It's her _power _that's doing all the theatrics."

I didn't respond to Lisa's words, or implications, because the ice in my veins had turned to piercing crystals, a stabbing pain, as I thought of the one person that had always stuck with me. Someone I'd been in frequent contact with. _Dad._

Those strange stares of his, that eerie look in his eye as he made himself scarce, his tendency to stay far away from me in the mornings... He had likely not made the connection, nor considered the possibility of _powers_, but he had noticed their effects. Every moment we spoke, every time we interacted in past months, this perversion of a power had been _making him see me as I saw myself. _I'd been pushing him away, even as I tried to keep him close.

_Don't trust _anyone, he'd said. _Not even me, _he'd implied_._

I couldn't go home.

A desperate sob made its way out of my throat then, and I teared up. I'd never been so glad that my body responded, that I wasn't just a helpless mannequin trapped in my own mind - but that didn't overshadow the terrifying thought of that morning - of what I'd done without realizing.

"Take it easy," Lisa murmured softly as she approached. "This can't be _everything _there is to know about your power_. _Most can be used in combat, and nearly every one protects their user to some degree - so clearly something's _wrong _with yours. My own gives me splitting headaches so I don't overuse it and burn out my neurons." She smiled slightly. "It's slightly annoyed with me right now, actually."

Alec snorted derisively, rolling his eyes.

"Listen -" Lisa started again. "I think that your power is transmitting your self-image, your view of yourself - but obviously it's a _flawed _image_._ This meek little prey animal vibe? That's not really you." She prodded me in the shoulder. "You're frozen stiff, but only because your power's making that happen. You're forced into this mold, and you don't quite fit."

"Wait…" Alec frowned. "This projected self-image isn't really _hers, _is it? If she hated herself _that _much, she'd have done something long ago..."

"The bullies," Lisa said with finality. "Those fucking _bullies._"

I stared at her with wide eyes. I'd told her about _them _in confidence, and with very few words. I'd never even said what they'd done to me. And she'd just put it out there, shameless. I glanced to Alec, who didn't seem to react in the slightest. That set my mind at ease, at least a little; I'd unwittingly used my power on him - this useless, terrible power - but he seemed to have forgiven me. He was even compassionate - that's what heroes were like, I guess.

I couldn't go back to school with this. I couldn't even go home. I didn't have anywhere else to go either, and if I went to anyone in charge, I already knew how it would turn out. I'd seen that in January, when I'd been ignored, trampled by a school board that cared little for justice. And my power… my power made people _hate _me. That wasn't a hero's power - I was a villain waiting to happen. The first time I'd use it in battle, I'd make every ally despise me. The first time I spent too long in a room with a PRT agent, he'd start suspecting me of horrible things.

And Lisa, a girl I'd met only mere weeks ago, was my only lifeline. Immune.

"Taylor?" she spoke up, and I glanced at her with desperation all too clear in my eyes. "You need to work with me here. I think your power internalized the way your bullies look at you, and then conformed you to their expectations. Powers are dumb." She smirked. "You were too strong for that kind of radical change to stick, though - that's why the other you shines through, sometimes. I think you believe you've given up, but something's clearly still protesting in there. That's what's messing you up inside. You're fighting your power."

"As she should," Alec muttered. "Once she really becomes this weaksauce stereotype, what's the point? She's be useless_." _

"Nobody said every power was helpful," Lisa noted darkly. "Better shy and mumbly than inducing every passing stranger to hate your skin." She frowned, glancing to the table, where a forgotten manuscript lay open. "I haven't taken into account another datapoint, though." She picked up _Mind Games _from the table_, _flipping through it swiftly. "This is thinker-work - or at the very least the work of a talented researcher who could figure out my power's leaps of logic. Considering Taylor's demeanor, I somehow doubt that she has the -" She stopped mid-sentence, and her gaze flick back to me with familiar intensity, glancing from the paper to me. "No. Way." Her mouth curled up into a foxy smile. "That's _cheating._"

I didn't have any idea what to say about the way she looked at me - predatory, almost. Dangerous. Her eyes glimmered with something that had been missing before - not compassion, but something more selfish, more greedy.

"Spoilers for the ungifted?" Alec inquired, clearly used to these moments of clarity.

"The shy weakling demeanor comes from the bullies," Lisa said. "But that's not the _only _part of Taylor's image which exists. She's been called a cape geek by myself, and by others - and even by herself. She had a history with that kind of thing before we even met. So when she sat down to do something _very _cape-geeky…"

Alec stared in disbelief. "Her power augmented her geek cred? Turned up the nerd factor to eleven?"

"Yeah. I think her power doesn't really distinguish between inputs," Lisa confirmed gleefully. "It absorbed what the bullies were saying, even though it wasn't true - but it also picked up on Taylor's own words, and mine. Her power grabs whatever it comes across."

He raised an eyebrow. "She's forced to become whatever people think she is?"

I think they'd forgotten I was there with them, that I was a participant - and I didn't mind in the slightest. If they were right about me, about my power, then it hadn't been _my _freaky emotions that had been ruining my life. I'd been making people hate me because someone else loathed me - a feedback loop of hatred. It had to stop. It _had to._

Lisa was my only chance - a cape, a friend. If she couldn't help me, couldn't rip this weakness away from me, then maybe _nobody _could.

"She becomes the lie, and reinforces it in whoever happens to be nearby," Lisa decided. "That's what we're dealing with here." She smiled at me. "Consider also that she didn't get the boost until _last week._ That would be the day that I told you guys about her. I mentioned that I was meeting someone, and that she was a cape geek. When that kind of comment comes from _my _mouth, what would be the obvious assumption that follows? Especially when I already let slip that I suspected she was a cape?"

"Geek as a code word for thinker powers?" Alec wondered. "But that was all back in the hideout - behind closed doors," he observed slowly. "Taylor doesn't know where it is, and nobody there knew who Taylor was either, except for you." He blanched. "No way. Her range…?"

Lisa grinned. "Maybe she doesn't even have one." She turned back to me. "Just saying - after this is settled, you are _so _hired." She cracked her knuckles. "Now, how about we figure out how to dissuade some bullies from their misapprehensions?"

The trio came immediately to mind - the three that started it all, that had hounded me for months, never relenting. They were victims - symptoms of my fucked-up power. Lisa wanted to do something to change their mind about me. To destroy the status quo.

A vicious heat in my chest lashed out, and there was a smile on my face for the briefest of moments, completely genuine and _mine. _Maybe they weren't the whole problem, but they were definitely part of it. Sometimes, the only thing you _could _do was fight symptoms.

* * *

**Interlude 2 - Alec & Lisa**

Though he tried to look aloof and uninterested, Alec's gaze still kept slipping across the basement to the rather lanky girl that Lisa had introduced. When he'd joined Lisa on one of her little trips, he'd expected to run into the unbalanced cape she'd taken under her wing. He'd even been a little disappointed by the utterly normal girl they'd finally met in a bar. Right up until Taylor had snagged him up with her power, barging through any resistance he might've built up without the slightest effort. That's when he'd been forced to pay attention.

She was _dangerous._

Even now, following a second exposure, he still had a hard time trying to figure out how her particular trick worked. That was - troubling. As far as he could tell, new thoughts and ideas seemed to just slip in between existing ones, influencing his behaviour even when he'd concentrated on what he intended to do. It was only a constant mantra repeated to himself that made him step back and retreat from what appeared to be perfectly reasonable distaste. It had taken a long, terrible moment before the conviction fled before his more reasoned thoughts, and things returned to normal.

She was dangerous - but also _effective. _Perhaps she didn't know to work her power yet, particularly due to its obvious detrimental effects on her own mind, but that didn't diminish its sheer potency. It reeked all too much of brainwashing. "Lisa?" Alec murmured under his breath, and she nodded from her position besides Taylor. "You know we can't just assault a school without a good excuse, right?"

"It's not about the school," Lisa replied after a few moments, frowning slightly. "The school is just a building, and I doubt any of the teachers are actively involved in bullying. Most students tend to just ape the popular ones - they'll turn to other topics when the old wells run dry. That's probably why Taylor's a little less… extreme, now. She's been away from that school for a while. People move on."

Alec noticed the girl twitching besides Lisa, and he nodded. "Right. You checked attendance records, I take it?" he concluded curiously. "You really don't have to be a stalker when you've already got your power, you know."

Lisa rolled her eyes. "So I do my homework. Sue me." Taylor seemed to shrink in on herself even further at the affronted tone. "Now, I have a pretty good idea of who these bullies are, so that gives us something to start from. I had to go onto the internet and read misspelled tirades, so have a little pity for me." She grabbed her phone from a pocket, tossing it over. "I figured this would come up at some point - didn't think it would be this instrumental."

Alec looked over Lisa's text, and frowned. "Winslow? I'd figured Arcadia, with the powers and all…" He shrugged. "Just three girls? We can work this."

Taylor slumped into her seat as if in defeat, though her eyes seemed to burn with something else. A sort of silent rage that couldn't get out - like she'd been locked inside her own head. As if thoughts of frailness and weakness were forced in between more useful ones - that thought gave Alec the shivers, and he looked away from those eyes. "You're not suggesting we take them out, are you?" Alec asked after a few moments, focusing on Lisa. "Because that shit would get us in way more trouble than anything we've had so far."

"Nothing that bad, I should think. This is probably just a power play - a few girls who get to feel mighty by victimizing someone that won't strike back," Lisa theorized. "What we need is to disrupt that perceptions. Perhaps supercede it with something else. I'm thinking… maybe we can convince them that Taylor's got powerful allies? Capes?" She shrugged. "Maybe we could just convince them that she's transferred away."

Taylor shook her head, leaning forward forcefully. "_No," _she stated emphatically. "They wouldn't…" She grimaced, looking away, but the sentiment was clear.

"Persistent ones, are they?" Alec mused. "There is another option to consider. It's a little more nuclear than the rest, but…" He sighed. "...We could convince them that she's dead."

It was silent for a long, terrible moment.

"Would that even work?" Lisa asked in a small voice. "Wouldn't it - no, powers don't generally hurt their users. Though I'm not sure why the current mess doesn't count…" She looked to Taylor and her eyes widened. "That's what I noticed on your face, isn't it? That first time we met. You've been suicidal before, but your power's been scrubbing it from your mind. Just like it adds ideas…" She nodded. "It _would _work, though."

"I said it was a nuclear option, didn't I?" Alec responded.

"It would open up _opportunities_," Lisa observed, an intrigued gleam in her eyes. Taylor didn't react at all, staring at the floor blankly. "See, if people think she's dead, they wouldn't really talk about her in the same way anymore. There's this veneer of respect that most people would fall back on when talking about the deceased, y'know? It would probably ease this pressure that her power puts on her, and she could take a new name afterwards. One without established history and baggage. A _cape _name."

Taylor looked up at that.

"I proposed Amalgam because of the whole two sides of one emotional coin thing you've got going on," she said airily. "There's plenty of time to think of better names. Anyway… we'd need to figure out something with your family, and the rest of your life - such as it is. You'd be able to get out of the public eye. Find some kind of equilibrium away from the world."

"We can't be taking in every stray, Lisa." Alec rubbed his forehead, regretting ever bringing up the distasteful possibility - it figured that she of all people would latch onto it. "You do realize what kind of shit you're inviting here?"

"Not much. There's only one parent," she responded easily. "One who presumably doesn't know what's going on, or she'd be _home_. I can call in a favor, get him somewhere safe... The death of a daughter would be more than enough reason to excuse someone moving out of Brockton Bay, so that can cover things." Taylor sobbed softly, and Lisa sighed. "Don't worry - I'll handle the talking. I am good at that."

"Suicide?" Alec considered, grimacing. "Accident, maybe?"

Lisa nodded slowly. "Suicide would be the least out of line with people's expectations, I think. A murder would just lead to a way more serious investigation, and setting things up as an accident might attract the wrong kind of attention. If it was suicide, most of the bullies would likely feel some degree of remorse or guilt, and those who don't… well, if they're that sociopathic, I doubt they'll think twice about her anymore. They'll move on."

Taylor didn't respond much, but her grip on Lisa's arm tightened. "Blame _them,_" she whispered at last, trembling.

Lisa raised an eyebrow. "Well, that's nice and vicious of you. If you insist."

For the briefest of moments, Taylor's gaze met hers and then Alec's with startling intensity. She didn't speak, but that wasn't necessary. Whatever was behind those eyes burned through the despairing mask of her power like fire. _She's dangerous, _Alec decided once more, and he edged the slightest bit away from her.

"We can't let this go on. Tomorrow we're going after those bullies - it's a weekday, so it shouldn't be too hard to track them down. If that doesn't solve things…" She sighed. "Well, the death thing will require… subtlety. It kind of gives me a deadline, pardon the pun, so I need to make some calls. That sound good?"

"...Okay," Taylor answered meekly, but her eyes were hard.

"God, this is gonna be such a mess," Alec muttered to himself. "A total disaster."

"Don't be too hasty," Lisa said slowly. "You haven't heard the half of it yet." Her smile was slightly menacing. "If Taylor's gonna change some minds tomorrow, she'll have to come across as confident. Desperate, maybe, but at the very least intelligible." She gestured to the quivering girl. "That's not gonna happen like this. Not on her own, anyway. So I was thinking..." She paused, and the silence stretched.

"What?" Alec stared back at her for a long moment, and then recoiled. "You're not saying _I -_"

"Hmhm. It can work, I think. Three minute intervals, minimal contact - and I'm shackling you to a chair for the duration. Just in case." She grinned viciously. "If you convince your inner Mr. Hyde to get the job done, _maybe _I won't tell the others that I had you tied up in the basement, alright? Sounds like a plan?"

"...Did I say this would be a disaster?" Alec said miserably. "I meant _cataclysm._"

* * *

**Rumors 1.6 - My Confrontation**

I had the uncomfortable suspicion that Lisa knew _exactly _where I'd spent the night. She narrowed her eyes at my scuffed clothes, the same ones I'd worn the previous day, and shook her head ruefully at the sight of my disheveled hair. Anyone could tell I'd stayed on the streets, but it beat the alternative. I refused to think about home.

Alec was already present, lounging on an all too familiar dumpster with his feet dangling limply in the air. He had an expression of supreme disinterest on his face, though even that was hard to make out from behind the hood of his loose-fitting jacket. Neither he nor Lisa were in their costumes, which suggested they weren't planning anything excessive.

Small comforts, I guess.

"Obviously, we don't have a lot of leeway on this one," Lisa said without preamble, pressing her lips together tightly as she glanced towards Alec. "If we don't want any of the others butting in we have to get this thing over with quickly. We'll have to see what works and run with it." She hesitated. "You're both ready, yes?"

Alec muttered something incomprehensible, twitching his fingers lazily, and I tried not to shiver as my hand swung up of its own accord, flipping off Lisa before miming something entirely predictable and disgusting. "Yeah, I got this down. Don't worry," my mouth announced, curling up into a grin that I didn't actually mean. "It's easy enough."

I was terribly glad that Alec was no longer the sadistic asshole that he became whenever he got a little too close to me and my screwed-up power. He could get very invasive and cruel, and he didn't need much of a push. At least he seemed appropriately aghast whenever he got out of range, which was _something. _Plus Lisa kept an eye on him.

"Hey, Taylor? You in there?" Lisa lifted up my chin, and I blinked owlishly at her. "The eyes - they're a little bit off. Usually they are -" She paused for a long moment, astonished. "Alec, you had more than enough time to get this down last night. You held back? Through _that?_"

Alec sighed. "...Look, I can be as sadistic as the next guy," he complained. "I still like to have a choice in the matter. Didn't feel right to get back in that groove, you know?" He slipped off the dumpster, and a shiver or relief ran up my spine as my body was returned to me. "Pointless torture is a little too _out there, _you understand? At least without a good reason..."

"Huh. Well, at least you turned back to normal," Lisa muttered. "By loose definitions of normal, of course."

"Har har."

I didn't quite know what to add to the conversation, far too caught up in the thought of what might happen next, so I tuned them out. School was almost done for the day, and the trio tended to stick together for a little while. Part of me was terrified of meeting them - they brought out a part of me that had been thoroughly beaten into the ground. But I had agreed to this, and that kernel of persistence refused to be stamped out.

"I don't really know how you normally speak, so you'll have to work with me a little." It took me a moment to realize Alec was speaking to _me_, and I nodded dumbly at him. "Basically I can reinforce what you're trying to do, but if you fight me you'll probably look like you're having a seizure or something. I'll keep you steady, prevent you from chickening out - but if you let your emotions seep through too much even schoolgirls are probably gonna pick up on that." He grinned thinly. "Adrenalin is a hell of a -"

Lisa shushed him, her head cocked to the side and her eyes closed. "The bell just rang. That gives us about five to ten minutes, maybe less." She looked at me. "I suppose this is it, then. I'll stay nearby, get some clues as to how things are going - Alec will be doing his thing. Remember that we're here and on your side, Taylor - that should give you a little leeway to use against your powers. Fingers crossed."

I nodded sluggishly, my gaze already fixed on the school's gate where a few students scampered off. They only briefly looked at me before moving on, and I realized belatedly that I was now alone, standing on the street corner with a lump in my throat. The whole plan suddenly felt awfully flimsy, like a house of cards. This was not how I'd imagined things would go. Befriending capes was one thing, but roping them into my life's problems? Or was it the other way around - had they roped themselves in? I couldn't understand why Lisa had been so proactive about all of it, or why Alec would bother to help a stranger.

My chaotic thoughts refused to still until a familiar face appeared at the gate. She brushed her red hair out of her face as she said something uncomplimentary to the girl behind her. I scowled at Emma - my friend, once upon a time - and at Sophia behind her. I expected to feel something like betrayal, or perhaps rage over past injustices, but all I managed was weary resignation.

My feet started walking an instant before I'd actually decided to do so, carrying me closer to her even while I tried to think of what to say, what to _do. _"Emma," I said of my own free will, despite Alec's all too tangible presence. "There you are."

She turned just as Madison appeared at the gate, and for a moment Emma looked utterly stunned, her eyes just slightly too wide as she took in my confident stance - definitely Alec's doing - and my blank expression. "...What -" she finally said, the quiver in her voice banished almost immediately. "What are you doing here, loser?"

"I thought we'd finally gotten rid of your stench," Sophia muttered with an exaggerated sneer, staring me down. "Ugh. Look at you, Hebert! Did you sleep on the _street? _What did you do, steal a cardboard box from the guy in the sewers? Maybe shacked up with some crack addicts?"

Fine, I knew I didn't look my best. I scoffed at her comments, though. "Whatever you say, Sophia. I'd hardly take fashion tips from a skank like you." I felt myself cringe, sort of, but my body didn't play along. Alec ensured that I merely smiled, perhaps a little more viciously than I would have done by myself.

Sophia put a hand on Emma's shoulder for a moment before she deliberately stepped into the gap between us. "You think you're suddenly hot shit, Hebert?" She started. "Honestly, I thought you'd finally seen _reason _and fucked off. But here you are again, still the creepy coward you always were, back for more. I should have known you were a glutton for punishment."

Alec made me roll my eyes, and Sophia reared back slightly at my bored confidence. Something vicious and hateful passed across her face before she looked away. "This isn't about _you,_" I said. "I haven't even come back for classes or anything. I just came to… clear the air with Emma, I suppose. To settle things."

"You shouldn't have bothered," Sophia said before my former friend could answer.

"Yeah, yeah. I know how you work." I reached into a pocket - Sophia tensed momentarily, perhaps delusional enough to think I had a gun - and I retrieved a little USB drive. It didn't actually have anything on it, but that wasn't really a problem. "...I've been carrying a recording device ever since you guys shoved me in the dumpster. It's got everything." I let that little lie percolate for a moment. "You understand, right?" Alec added lightly.

Sophia didn't seem impressed, although Emma and Madison paled. "What do you think you're going to do with _that?_" she demanded, and her hand snapped out to meet mine. I'd already stuffed the 'evidence' back into my pocket. "Honestly, the most you might rat us on is cursing, maybe a little verbal… recreation. Hardly something worth more than a detention or two."

"The principal will think rather differently," I said without a stutter. Alec was a _godsend. _"I have dirt on you, now - on _all _of you." I kept Sophia's gaze for a long few moments, on Alec's insistence, but she didn't react. "A few friends of mine are keeping an eye on things, just in case you want to get tricky… If it looks like I might be pressured into keeping quiet they'll go to the police, or worse."

"Worse?"

"I know a few people. Bad people." I shrugged. "You never know who might be interested in a little blackmail…"

"You're _such _a freak," Sophia said sharply, stepping forward again and grasping for my pocket. "Give that shit -"

My hand snapped out to intercept hers, closing tightly around her wrist and twisting it away from me. She was strong - I could feel my muscles protesting - but Alec made it seem effortless. Sophia tried to shake me off, but my grip remained.

"...Keep your filthy fingers off me, freak!" she snarled.

"Heh. I might be a freak," I murmured. "I don't know what that makes _you, _though. Someone's rotten shitstain?" Alec forced my mouth into a grin. "You've lowered yourself to bullying classmates instead of actually doing something worthwhile with your time, haven't you? Says a lot more about you than it ever did about me." I released her wrist, enjoying her furious scowl. "Fuck you, Sophia. Fuck you very much."

_"_No, _fuck _you!" Emma exclaimed suddenly, pushing past the darker-skinned girl. I'd almost forgotten she was even there. "You weren't here for a _month, _right?" she demanded of me. "Did you spend that entire time crying, like that time your mo -"

Before I'd quite realized it my hand was at her throat, digging into her neck, and she slammed into the solid concrete pillars of the school's gate with a thud. Her eyes were now almost impossibly wide, and I'd cut her off mid-way to a scream. I didn't care if Alec had been involved at all, because I knew what Emma had been about to say. _Bitch!_

"_Shut up_," I spat, glancing back to Sophia who was looking at me like a cat who just spotted a particularly delicious canary. Madison wasn't even there anymore. I hadn't seen her leave. "You don't get it, do you? Neither of you are worth the dirt I stand on," my mouth declared. "A month ago you might have had a point in criticizing me. Maybe." I released Emma, stepping back from her. "Not so much, now."

"You really think that a little bit of violence is all it takes?" Sophia said dangerously, glancing at her friend who was trying to put on a brave face. "You're one of those idiots who thinks that they're awesome after a self-defense class or two, right?" She smiled a poisonous smile at that. "You're still _weak. _See if you can make _me _move, why don't you?"

"I'm not confident because _I_ can kick you ass," I said mildly, grinning. "But _we _can."

There was a flicker of recognition in Sophia's eyes - that murderous look made way for something like wariness. Behind her, Alec cleared his throat. His _own _throat. I hadn't seen him step into view, but he was now leaning idly against the wall a short distance away, still seemingly bored, his face overshadowed by his hoodie. He didn't say anything, but judging by Sophia's guarded expression he'd cut a rather more impressive figure than he might have without the getup. He didn't even have to speak.

"Fuck, you went to the Empire?" Sophia said slowly, mostly to herself. "You wouldn't -"

"I wouldn't _what? _Things _change,_" I said sharply, dragging her attention back to me. Although I'd gone into things with the thought of focusing on Emma, the one I'd known best, it was clear that Sophia was running the show. Had that always been the case? "The bullying is _over_. If you continue - in any way_ \- _then I will be releasing those audio records to the authorities, alongside all the other things I've saved up over the years. Got that?"

"You don't impress me with that blackmailing bullshit," Sophia remarked. "Go, release that crap to the world if you're so keen on airing your own dirty laundry. You're not gonna get anything done. You know that, right?" She scoffed. "You can't touch me_."_

"Maybe." I smiled. "But I'm still recording. I will find something."

"You've - you're _crazy,_" Emma spat, rubbing her neck and wincing.

"Crazy?" I repeated. "You know, I wonder what the police would say if I were to do something _rash, _retaliation for the shit you put me through?" I hesitated, but Alec pushed me on. "I could do something _terrible_... There's plenty of evidence that you've been bullying me for ages, and you know what people would think. Sympathy for a latter-day Carrie, right? Lenient sentencing, certainly."

"You really _are _nuts," Sophia snarled under her breath. "Fuck this. We're leaving." She turned away from me, glancing back towards Alec briefly. "Come, we'll sort this out some other way." Her eyes promised evisceration before she turned away. "I'll figure out a solution."

"But -" Emma tried.

I didn't hear Sophia's response, but Emma cringed at whatever it was.

"And _stay _away," I muttered lamely in the aftermath, glaring at my feet as I heard their footsteps fade down the sidewalk. I could have followed them, or escalated things - but there was no point. Sophia wasn't suddenly going to change, and Emma was far more of a follower than I'd ever thought. She'd folded at the slightest sign of resistance.

Madison, judging from her quick retreat, had long since given up.

It didn't really matter. There had been no fight, no punches. And I was the one left standing, the only one that hadn't run off from our little confrontation. That was something of a victory, I figured. Alec released his hold on me, leaving me alone with my own body. I took a few long, deep breaths, and decided that I felt… warm. It might've been a trick of the mind - confirmation bias, perhaps. But something of that suffocating blanket of misery had moved away, thinned. Something had _changed._

Lisa was suddenly there - she slipped out of the gate and caught me in something resembling a hug. She didn't speak, but her expression told me more than enough. However her power worked, she'd picked up on it too. Something _was _different. It would take time, perhaps, and effort. Maybe another run-in or three with people I despised.

"...Thank you," I whispered. The weight on me didn't feel so crushing. "Thank you both. I know I couldn't have done that alone." I shuddered. "Although I'm not that much of a foulmouth, Alec. Thanks."

Lisa beamed. "Taylor, you're using your words!"

Ah.

So I was.

"Look, I had a little idea about that research paper you made," Lisa whispered then, grinning wildly. "Of course, we'll have to see if this whole words thing sticks first, but what do you reckon we celebrate with a drink or two and I pitch my proposal? And there's a bunch of things I got from your little run-in with those - _girls. _I know a wonderful restaurant…"

I tuned her out, and judging from Alec's smirk he picked up on that.

I could worry about Sophia later. _Much _later. For now it was enough to enjoy her retreat.

Things weren't perfect, but my smile was real.


	3. Rumors 7

**Interlude 3 - PHO**

* * *

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* * *

**Topic: Casual Cape Chat Free-For-All XVI  
In: Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion**

**Bruce Lao  
**Posted on May 6th, 2011:

I thought I would make a new incarnation of this venerable thread, since the last one's been an oversized eyesore for far too long. Last time around the discussion went a little off the rails when it came to Miss Militia, so please contain yourselves, whoever you are. I'd rather not get the mods back here so soon, especially over that sort of thing... The Banhammer will be swift and merciless.

Aside from that, Ekul mentioned recent unrest with the Wards, but it's probably best to keep on the down-low about that since there is already a relevant team board to discuss anything that might be going around there (or you can go to Off-Topic.) Other than those pointers, which are there to guide proper discussion, you can have at it!

**(Showing Page 16 out of 16)**

**► WaywardWanderer**  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
XxVoid_CowboyxX : I think you're taking things too far. Bruce mentioned the previous nasty derails, and you were well on your way to starting your own about Shadow Stalker. (Speaking off the record, what were you thinking?) I'd like to cut off that sort of thing before it gets started. Again.

Erato : I don't think tinkers work like that. At least, I've read a few interviews with Kid Win, and he comes off as having too many ideas to cope with, rather than some sort of Platonic access to all possible knowledge. So it's more a supercharging of creativity with a helping of blueprints than just plain hacking into reality. That's probably why there's themes - everyone's different, some people are more adept at certain things than others. Armsmaster is a good example to use here, I think, since he really custom-builds everything for his own use.

Amalgam : I admit, you have me stumped on that one… I suppose we've been lucky so far, and nobody really powerful has shown up with that kind of bullshit powerset? I mean, besides maybe - you know. glances up nervously

**► Amalgam**  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
Even if S is an example of what I propose, her scale of the destruction is still pretty limited on the whole compared to what could be done in theory - a scary proposition, I know. A small blessing of the EB is probably that they don't team up… I think I'll put this issue on the backburner for future discussion. This topic is depressing.

**► Alathea** (Moderator: Brockton Bay)  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
Amalgam : Since you're chatting here, you might want to know your submitted post from yesterday will be appearing in sticked form later today. It's the third of these you've done, right? It's about time we think about giving you a badge for your hard work!

**► White Fairy **(Veteran Member)  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
Another shower of cape geekery so soon? I for one, welcome our new mixed-metallic overlord! You know, there's been some rumours going around the comments section if you've noticed, are you inclined to reply to any of those things? I'm thinking particularly of [Edit by Mod]

I admit, your insights into the local Brockton Bay efforts of the ABB make me a little suspicious...

**► Amalgam**  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
I will preempt Alathea on this question, and note that asking board members about their possible status as a cape is against the terms of service. Rumours have a habit of spreading, so be aware of that. I assume you remember the debacle that was Four Eyes? Yeah.

**► Childrizzle**  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
Yo, did any of you catch any wind of a robbery on the west end, last night? My dad was yelling about some villains getting involved, but the news has been silent… Anyway, it's probably nothing, but I figured I'd ask.

Amalgam : Smooth dodge!

**► WaywardVagabond**  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
I haven't heard anything about a robbery, but perhaps it was Squealer, or Skidmark, or any of those? Seems like the kind of low-level villainy that would fit. Also, Amalgam, you know that kind of response will just get people talking, right? Though, I guess I don't know what would convince the rumor-mongers that they're wrong - they're kinda stuck in their own little world of make-believe, I'm sure… So, yeah. Do whatever you have to.

**► Alathea **(Moderator: Brockton Bay)  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
White Fairy : No warning dealt out this time, since Amalgam already handled this. Still, you've been here a long time, so you know better! (I keep having to tell people that today…) Just enjoy Amalgam's articles, there's no need to get any deeper into who the author is. Anonymity is a right on these boards.

Amalgam : I've had a sneak peek at the new article, and I think people will enjoy this one like the last - but we'll get into the real cool stuff soon! Thinkers, blasters, changers are fine, but I am waiting for tinkers, trumps and strangers.

End of Page. 1, 2, 3 ... 14, 15, 16

* * *

**Topic: Amalgam the Cape?  
In: Boards ► Off-Topic ► Cape Speculation **  
_Mod Note: Please remember : this board is for unverified or unverifiable information. Nothing here should be considered uncritically by anyone. Sufficiently crude threads will be deleted, but moderation is light. Discussion of board members is permitted, but frowned upon, so tread lightly around sensitive topics. Thank you._

**► Kamtzutz **  
Posted on May 4th, 2011:

Alright, it's been making the rounds, so there should totally be a topic on Gammy, right? I've seen this stuff go by in /news and over on the Brockton Bay forums, and people are speculating we're dealing with an undercover cape or some PRT guy who isn't admitting it. Writing these cape-ego-stroking things is probably evidence enough, right?

You can find Amalgam and his/her posts here: Linkie.

Amalgam started posting in the BB forums a few weeks back, so that's probably where s/he's from, that's obvious. Any capes there who would do this kind of thing? Anyone who lives there on here or are they all in their own forum?

**(Showing page 6 out of 6)**

**► Incoherent_Guttural_Noises**  
Replied on May 4th, 2011:  
I haven't read the whole thread, but first thought here is that this is probably against the ToS. I know that this particular board is lenient, but this is still Parahumans online - keeping capes on our good side is kind of obligatory. We probably don't want to go out anyone. IF Amalgam is a cape or family of one, clearly she (yes, she's a woman as per her Q&A) doesn't want to broadcast that. Hell, she might be a rogue - or god forbid a villain. Doesn't really matter on an anonymous board, but still.

**► Sól**  
Replied on May 4th, 2011:  
Oh, come on, your just being defensive now IGN. If you are already guessing at whether she (thx) is a rogue, then you must believe the cape thing. Look, we know so far that she is from BB, that she is online every evening and that she knows a helluvalot about pretty much everything capeish, right? First post is a bit rough looking back but everything after that was brilliant… How does someone get all dat info when they're not PRT or cape?

**► Mako-Sabre**  
Replied on May 5th, 2011:  
The first post was rough? What. That post you're referencing is why Amalgam got picked up by the mods! Mind Games was a fantastic analysis of all the various thinker capes there have been, and I certainly haven't seen its better outside a few books you'd have to pay solid bucks for. Getting that sort of detailed and referenced article for free is just magic, and it's no wonder that it got noticed real quick. The sequel thread has so far been at least on that level if not better, so I don't think Amalgam is going anywhere soon. Not until she gets through all the cape classifications, anyway. Also, the day she finally gets to the EB will be so awesome...

**► JENGOROTH**  
Replied on May 6th, 2011:  
We're getting a bit off-topic here... Which is fitting for the board but never mind. Given that the original article was all about thinker capes, and the articles have already been mentioned as well-researched and thorough, why not search an explanation in that area? A thinker power might synergize pretty well with the net, seeing as it is all information anyway. A cyber-cape maybe?

Oooh, what if she's an artificial intelligence? conspiracy

**► Incoherent_Guttural_Noises**  
Replied on May 6th, 2011:  
JenGoroth, I can see your inference, but I don't think there's anything beyond talent involved here. Certainly I don't get the impression that parahuman powers were required for either of the articles written so far by Amalgam - I haven't checked the third yet - and I have no idea why you would think so. Are all researchers parahumans now, you reckon? Let's stick with the likely explanations, okay?

**► Amalgam **(The Gal in the Know)  
Replied on May 7th, 2011:  
I don't know if I should be flattered or creeped out that I get my own stalker thread! I mean, there's already one or two fan threads over on the BB boards, but this one was stuffed away in some dark corner, like you guys didn't think I'd notice. Cute.

Mako-Sabre, Incoherent_Guttural_Noises : Thank you very much!

JENGOROTH : It's flattering to think that I'm good enough you're suspecting super-shenanigans, but be careful. If this weren't the rumor-mill of the forums, the mods would have already swept in to give you a warning, so please be sure to keep that sort of talk out of the public spaces. Rumours have a tendency of spreading.

More stuff will arrive soon! Even better than before!

**End of Page. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6**

* * *

**Private message from Bagrat (Veteran Member) (The Guy in the Know):**

**Bagrat:** Oh what the hell?! It took me four years to get my tag! FOUR!  
**Amalgam:** I guess the mods like me? Sorry!  
**Bagrat *New Message*:** I call shenanigans! Hax, I tell you! HAX!

* * *

**Whispers 1.7 - My Ego**

"Hey Lisa." I slipped into a seat across from her, a cup of steaming tea already in front of me. "So, how are the forces of evil today?"

"I'm not evil," Lisa said, and she eyed me with amusement. "I'm just bored, really. I thought I'd visit you, because which Thinker wouldn't want a nice afternoon headache?" Her smile was kind. "I just thought you could use a bit of outside contact, given your situation."

I nodded tiredly. I looked decent enough for someone that was slumming in a disused safehouse, but that wasn't saying much. I didn't mind it, actually. Lisa said the whole building had once been in Empire territory, but it got abandoned when the ABB made advances into the area. For the moment it was neutral ground, and about as safe as any villain safehouse could be. Alec had actually dropped by a few times already, ostensibly just to store some of his things, but I suspected that he was trying to be supportive in his own 'won't touch you with a ten-foot-pole' kind of way.

I hadn't gone home in weeks.

I'd called dad with Lisa's phone, of course, but there was no way I could explain what exactly was going on - not over the phone, and not so soon. Maybe when I got a handle on my power I would reconsider, but it was better for both our sakes that we weren't too close right now. At least dad had refrained from calling the police, as long as I kept in contact. I didn't care to think about what he might imagine was happening. Nothing good, I figured. Hopefully my power would keep well enough alone.

I forced myself to look back at Lisa, and focused on her instead. Lisa had never straight-up lied to me about it, and Alec had been even less subtle, but I'd completely ignored the possibility that they might be honest-to-God supervillains. Even after they pretty much admitted it in front of me, it had taken me three more days before I really believed it. Villains.

The obligatory paranoia had set in later, when I was by myself. The first time we met I'd been far too desperate to think twice about Lisa's open hand, too convinced of my own inadequacy to question what she was offering. Whatever we changed about the trio's views at Winslow, though, had also changed me. I was more like my old self, now, but that old self was colder and more suspicious by far. Where before I'd seen only the promise of safety in Lisa's gesture, now I couldn't help but notice the shadows.

That first meeting on the Boardwalk, when Lisa sat down next to me, had it really been for my benefit or was it just the first step in recruiting someone for her team? If she caught onto my power, someone as desperate as me must have looked like a great catch, and new villains had to come from somewhere. They always said that it was really easy to get caught up in crime, and what better way than to offer a sympathetic hand when nobody else would? That's how the Empire 88 and ABB got their members, so why would it be any different here?

Despite all that, I still thought that Lisa had to be at least mostly genuine. She'd refrained from the kind of heavy-handed manipulation she was perfectly capable of, and on previous days I would've folded like a leaf. I'd become an obsessive geek on her mere suggestion. Whatever else her motives were, she'd done all she could to help me, and given me some degree of agency back. She hadn't pushed me into the deep end.

Villains weren't supposed to be nice. How did someone like that end up a criminal?

"Heavy thoughts?" Lisa said dryly. "You're not this gloomy in your other life. Writing three monster papers in as many weeks seems excessive, even for a geek." She cocked her head to the side. "I know I sort of pushed you into this, but you're just showing off now!"

"I must've gotten that from somewhere," I said blandly. "The first one was hardest, anyway. I didn't know your way of writing and taking notes, or where to find all the good info I needed online. Hadn't learned how to google properly, and a lot of other things. The second went quicker, because I had shortcuts. I figured it'd take a week, but I was done in five days. This one…" I shrugged. "Four or so? I think I'm closing in on some kind of optimum speed. I'd probably need to delegate to get much more efficient."

"Listen to you! Channel that cape geekery, and all the social awkwardness just falls away, doesn't it?" She pouted, then. "Of course, at this rate you'll run out of things to talk about before I can compile even a tenth of the information you'd require for something new." Honestly, she didn't seem particularly upset by that. "We might have to team up on research!"

"Sure. Working on this stuff is addictive," I said with a shrug. "You know what's that like, right? You're a Thinker. I'm a knock-off, but it still sort of counts." I smiled wryly. "You know, when I put Mind Games on PHO, I got this rush…"

"You like being the smartest one in the room? Can't imagine what that's like."

"It's just that everytime I go online, I get inspired," I explained, colouring a little. "Every day dozens of messages come in about my articles. I can't ignore those. Through them I end up on cape sites again, and before I know it…" I sighed. "It's a curse."

The truth was more complicated. On PHO, nobody knew who I was, and nobody cared a bit about my life. I might as well be a bug underfoot in real life, but there I could talk without facing instant judgment, judged by my actions rather than my looks or detractors. At Lisa's urging I'd posted an edited version of Mind Games, listing only public references and carefully omitting some of the more speculative sections, and within a day it had made its way to half a dozen boards across Parahumans Online, spread by word of mouth alone. By the end of the week mods had stickied the post.

My new account went from a nobody to something of an authority on cape matters in a staggeringly short time, and suddenly I had more 'friends' than I could manage. The internet decided that I was one of them, and that was all it took. My power latched onto that abstraction and turned it into something real. Amalgam became an escape, a masked identity for a digital world.

Having a vague and ill-defined power like mine was _annoying, _even after getting used to the idea of being a parahuman. I wasn't sure how powerfully things would affect me, nor what exactly contributed, and it wasn't something I could easily test. Whereas Lisa's power was fairly straightforward in its general limitations, with a built-in warning against overuse, I couldn't even guess at my own. How was it that a handful of bullies, or maybe a few dozen people willfully ignoring me, had led me to the edge of misery, but thousands of people online only edged up my cape-geek cred incrementally over the span of weeks? Was it proximity, because I knew them, or because it was more personal? Was it something else still?

Like so many things in life, I wished someone had provided a manual.

"Taylor? You're doing the silent and gloomy thing again," Lisa said. "You're actually doing well, you know, with the whole power thing. I think your range has halved since we met, the waitress hasn't given you a stinkeye since at least last Tuesday, and my head is fine. Good news!"

Lisa was exaggerating, I knew that. I wasn't very fond of trying out my 'range', but the last time I'd gotten a decent estimate it had still been more than five feet, and closer to six. Lisa was just trying to make me feel better, because she was my friend. Which, admittedly, did make me feel better. I had a suspicion that second layer was her whole intent, too.

Fucking Thinkers.

"Taylor -" Lisa said at length, seeming a little uncomfortable. "We should really talk about your options. One of these days you'll have to meet the rest of the team, even though you're probably not gonna be joining us. I can't get away with these semi-clandestine meetings until someone more troublesome than Alec comes by to have a look at you." She paused. "Thing is, my team's in the dark about you. They don't know what you can do, and Alec's promised not to let things slip. He's smart enough to realize the consequences if he doesn't." She nodded to herself. "And you're enough of a cape geek now to get what I'm thinking about."

I could guess. "You want to lie to your own team, right? Isn't that kind of -"

"But it's not a lie, see?" Lisa interrupted with something like glee. "They already believe you're a thinker, which is pretty accurate. If you play it up, your power should pick up on that. I don't know how much we can stretch the lie, but 'inexperienced thinker' seems like it'd allow for some, shall we say, growth." She nodded to herself. "You can't be seen as a villain, or you'd alienate a ton of people right away, but you can get a little bit of word-of-mouth just from showing up."

"You've thought this through."

"Hmhm! It's best if you introduced yourself as a rogue. Rogues pretty much get along with everyone, even if you might get a little more scrutiny from the Protectorate for it." Lisa put a finger on her chin and mimed deep thought. "See… between the cape geekery you already picked up, and a bit of coaching on my part, you should be able to convince the others that you're the real deal when it comes to cape stuff. And if they all think you're the real deal..."

"You think my power would kick in and make it so," I filled in. I considered that, asking myself if I could keep my act together long enough to make a difference. Would I start trembling like a reed the moment I was exposed to a gang of villainous strangers? Or would I grow a spine just because a bunch of people thought I had one already?

Not for the first time, I wished I'd just gotten an Alexandria package and be done with it.

Huh. That was a thought. Could I convince some people I was Alexandria-Lite, and pick it up by osmosis…? How many random people on PHO would buy into that long enough for it to stick? Could I afford to risk the credibility I'd earned on a big claim like that?

Lisa smiled dangerously, perhaps aware of my train of thought. "There's something else we should decide on. My friends already know I get headaches around you, so it won't be very hard to stretch that a little. What do you think about claiming you have precog and thinker-scrambling as part of your power? I can think of a few ways it might come in handy down the line. Your power's already Trump-y to begin with, so I would just be stretching the truth. The Aura thing could be described by analogy to Glory Girl's version. She can turn it off, so it'd be handy if that carried over."

Okay, clearly Lisa was a lot more thoughtful about this than I was. I felt out of my depth, and let out a long breath I'd been holding. Planning these things was weird, because I wasn't sure what would work, and what would crash and burn in failure. Lisa talked big, but she probably had no more idea than I did until we tried. Maybe mundane skills were my limit, and my cape geekery was just regular smarts instead of Thinker-territory. In that case it'd make me a more complicated version of Über. Maybe it was limited to mental effects, which would leave me a potentially potent Thinker. Or perhaps it was everything.

"I need a drink," I decided, never mind that they wouldn't sell it to me. I could use it to soothe my suddenly swollen ego. The fact that I'd even thought about comparing myself to- "A stiff one."

Lisa smiled, and I had the strangest thought that right then she resembled nothing more than a particularly vicious cat, toying gleefully with a mouse. "Someday, you'll thank your lucky stars you ran into me before you decided to make your debut." She whistled innocently as she left me with my grandiose thoughts of flying side by side with Alexandria, beating up the worst of the worst. It was a nonsensical thought, but fantasies didn't need to be realistic to be nice. "Isn't that right, Little Miss Eidolon?"

"Shut up!" I hissed, my eyes flashing to the waitress. "It was just a momentary thought! A flight of the imagination! Stop using your power!"

Her smug grin didn't fade. "That was just from reading your expression, actually. I thought of that particular possibility last week. Hysterical cackling was involved." It wasn't hard to imagine that. "So, how about we hash out some specifics? Tomorrow we'll set off on the long hard road to abusing the ever-loving hell out of your bullshit power for fun and profit."

This time, I couldn't help that my smile was every bit as wicked as hers.

She was a _terrible_ influence on me.

...

* * *

**Non-Canon Omake : Wishmaker (or: Shard's Path to Halping)**

I looked into my glass of tea with distant fascination, watching little bubbles rise to the top and vanish as it slowly cooled from ungodly temperatures. I'd half-expected Lisa to show up, but today I was by my lonesome. I still enjoyed the familiar little ritual. The waitress had moved to the back, leaving me the only patron - clearly, she had little to do. For a moment, I rested my eyes and listened to the distant tunes on the radio, letting my mind wander.

"Miss?"

I opened my eyes, glancing down my nose at a woman who had appeared across from me, probably while I was dozing off. She looked decidedly out of place in the dingy bar, with her neatly trimmed hair and expensive suit, but her expression betrayed nothing more than honest curiosity.

"Yes? Can I help you?" I asked, gauging the distance between us and wondering if my power would start messing with her mind. "I prefer my privacy."

"I can understand that. However… May I?" She edged back the seat across from me, sitting down with unusual grace. "I do hope this is not too presumptuous, but you seem... preoccupied."

I snorted, picking up my tea and stirring it. "True. These last few weeks haven't been easy, and this is what passes for my down-time. Drinking in a bar and dreaming about better worlds." Like one in which I was Alexandria instead of Depression Girl. I thought about my research, and dad, and felt bad. "I could be doing far more, but without support these things are difficult."

The waitress arrived, placing some kind of fancy multi-layered coffee blend on the table in front of my newfound table guest. I pulled a face. "Ugh, I don't care for such a Witches' brew," I muttered. "I'll stick to perfectly normal tea, thank you. Although I do prefer it rather stronger than most."

"Opinions, opinions," she said, shifting back in her seat. "You're from around here, I take it? Brockton Bay?"

"Pretty much, yeah," I said. "I like to think I'm well-informed on the rest of the world. I'm sure you can empathize." I'd recognized an accent in her voice, though I couldn't pinpoint it. "Maybe I'll find a way to travel the world, someday - it might be good for me. I have a little trouble getting myself to walk out the door, though." Getting away from home and from dad didn't seem like a bad idea, considering my power troubles, but it was still strange.

"You want to travel, then?" she asked. "What would you do? Where would you go?"

"Well, what would you do on vacation?" I asked lightly, and she frowned. "It's simple, really. I'd see some sights, meet some people, visit all the places I've always wanted to - before they're destroyed, of course." The Endbringers made me a little queasy, even at the best of times. "I'm not sure if I'd have the stomach for some of it, but you never know until you try…" I couldn't help but shudder at the thought of the huge crowds that would doubtlessly dominate tourist spots - and the effects my power might have on them.

"You're afraid of something?" the woman inquired, catching my shiver.

"Well, not afraid, just wary. I don't like hur-" I stopped myself. "No. Honestly, I'm afraid I'd get in trouble out there. Here too, for that matter. The world is a cruel place, even if you have the best intentions in mind." I colored at that. "There's real monsters out there," I confided, thinking of the trio and what they'd done to me. Even best friends and popular people could turn bad. "They might dress up nice and shiny, and act like they're amazing, but they can ruin your life."

"I am very aware," she said morosely. "Have you ever thought of taking revenge?"

I laughed at that, with a strangely unpleasant sound. "How? Beating up some individual is not the solution, even if you could. They're not the real problem at all - just a symptom of bigger, badder issues." I shook my head. "If we want to solve things, we need to chop at the root. I'm not sure that's possible, however."

"You must know you're not alone in this," the woman observed. "The evils of the world are best fought together."

I rolled my eyes, thinking of Lisa and Alec and how they'd helped me with the trio. Things were easier together, but the motivations of Emma nor Sophia had changed a bit. They would still hunt down the next person weak enough to bend to their insults. It was endless.

"Honestly, if not even the Triumvirate can change things, nor the Protectorate and their legions of heroes, what can the rest of us do?" I thought of dad, and how he'd tried. "What if it all just end up backfiring on you?"

"I think that's a risk we should be willing to take," she said, drinking from her Franken-coffee.

"So, fortune favors the bold?" I inquired with a smile.

She stared at me. "Quite." She reached to her bag, removing a package and putting it in front of me. She looked at it with a frown. "These - are travelling papers, and enough money to cover expenses. This will allow you to move freely between nations. You'll need to add photographs yourself, but the rest is covered. Consider it a… gift."

I stared down at the package, about to ask why the hell she was carrying that kind of stuff with her, when the woman stood up in one smooth movement. At the same time, I realized that the thought of some obviously rich mystery woman swooping in to give her a vacation seemed like the kind of ridiculous thing Lisa would set up. Was this just another layer of the recruiting scheme? She had to start giving the Undersiders more credit.

"I'm sure we'll meet again," the woman said. "I look forward to hearing of your exploits."

I stared down at the package for a long time after she left, before finally opening it. There were instructions inside on how to finalize the papers, such that they would be fully legal. I wasn't sure how that worked - but a free vacation was looking awfully tempting right then.

"Hmmm…" I held up the passport. "Since when is my surname _Black_?"

* * *

"That's when I left." Not for the first time, Contessa felt like her power was controlling her, rather than the other way around - she'd been coached in conversation at every step, down to her exact wording, and she'd only picked up on what exactly Mystery Girl was saying after she'd already started responding. "You realize what this could mean?"

"She knew who you were - who we were," David observed. "She referenced Witches' Brew as compared to tea - our power formulas versus natural triggers, obviously. She effectively called you by name as well, which would suggest a high Thinker rating."

"She knew of Scion's true nature," Contessa pointed out. "Both his innocent act, and the fact that his tangible body is just an extension of the entity itself."

"Is this all accurate?" Doctor Mother inquired as she studied the transcription I'd given her - the whole conversation, recorded in detail. "Of course it is," she added acerbically. "It still doesn't make sense, though. If she's a natural trigger, as she implied, we'd expect limitations."

Contessa frowned. "Perhaps, but she seemed aware of what parts of the world would be destroyed - which would imply precognition of Endbringers." She shivered - it was a vital part of shortening the path to her latest chosen victory, although she wasn't sure why. "She's two for two, with that."

"This level of precog is unprecedented," Doctor Mother said, and she turned to David. "If she covers two of Contessa's blind spots, how about a third?"

A niggling suspicion bloomed in the back of Contessa's mind as she considered the inconsistency of having a power which could affect both the entity and the Endbringers, but would let her own power mess around without issue. What if Mystery Girl had just been humouring her all along? Contessa started a new, brief path - to find the girl's identity. After a brief instant the path collapsed - as she'd expected. She returned to her original path, and found that, at least, was still intact, doubtless because the steps involving her were already fulfilled.

David narrowed his eyes in focus, doubtlessly gathering some manner of Thinker power to himself. His frown grew. "...I cannot get a read on her," he said.

Contessa sighed - another step. "Clearly, she was not immune to thinker powers when we spoke. Now she is. I'd say that's confirmation of Trump abilities."

"High-end ones too, considering her apparent lack of limitations," David said. "...Please tell me she's not Eidolon 2.0?"

Contessa placed her palm on her face. _"__...Bullshit."_

_Path complete._


	4. Shitlist 1 - 2

**Shitlist 2.1 - Adler**

You had to admire the Nazis for one thing: they had _style_.

Living in the basement of a disused Empire hideout, it was difficult not to notice the motifs that popped up in all sorts of unexpected places. The forks and spoons all had little eagle-shaped decorations, there was a statue of freaking Odin in the bedroom, and all the doorknobs bore a cutesy pattern of connecting iron crosses. Plus, there was the flag. Not an old-timey German flag, as one might expect, but a remarkably high quality All-American star-spangled banner.

With little swastikas inside the stars.

I mean, they were still _Nazis_.

I stared up at the darkened ceiling, trying not to think. The glare of my laptop was the only thing that illuminated my basement, casting the decor in an eerie light. Things couldn't be more different from my comfortable room back home, and that contrast made me feel a little melancholy. I was inclined to dive back into research and spend the remainder of the evening setting up my fourth journey of excavation into Lisa's research, since it would be easier than thinking about the important things.

Still, I couldn't stop thinking about the elephant in the room. Lisa was a self-confessed criminal, a supervillain, and I was decidedly not. Nor did I want to be. Like most children, I'd always dreamed of beating up the bad guys, not sharing tea with them.

What the hell was I supposed to do now?

I was tempted to run off to the big-time heroes, whom I'd grown up watching on television. I imagined laying out all my problems so they could solve them with a wave of their metal hands, or with a fistful of lasers. That was how the system worked, right? But going to the heroes would also mean abandoning Lisa. We'd be on opposite sides. I couldn't see myself betraying the one person who made an effort to help me. Not after what happened between myself and Emma. I'd sooner face betrayal all over again than risk stepping onto that road myself.

If I couldn't be a fancypants hero, and I didn't want to be a villain, it didn't leave me much room. There were distressingly few capes who ever managed to stay unaligned, with Parian the only obvious example in Brockton Bay. Other former Rogues had become Wards, like Shadow Stalker, or got conscripted into local gangs and turned into so much cannon fodder.

Being a cape, it turned out, wasn't all sunshine and robots. Who knew.

Putting my newfound talents to good use, I'd already put some hours into researching the local cape scene, trying to get an idea of where everyone stood. I already knew about the Empire 88, the ABB and the Merchants, all of which clashed with each other and the local heroes on a regular basis. I didn't know much about Lisa's team though, beyond vaguely hearing their name on the news sometimes. Logically, I focused on them.

The Undersiders were a relatively minor-league villain team, as such things went, mostly known for robberies and other low-level criminality. Learning that eased my conscience a little, at least, although it wasn't hard to tell they were the wrong kind of people. The PHO wiki wasn't very circumspect about Hellhound's involvement in someone's death, and the entire team was wanted for a whole litany of crimes. Were these just the kinds of people Lisa hung out with? Or were they like her, sympathetic beneath a lawless veneer?

Wishful thinking, probably.

I'd met Alec already, and he'd definitely been less approachable than Lisa. He never showed up at the bar after the first time, and he never called, but he did drop by the basement unexpectedly, always with some vague excuse on his lips. Sometimes he ended up watching television for an hour before he wandered off again. Once, he'd been in costume.

At no point during those visits had he seemed anything other than completely bored out of his mind. He wasn't exactly a shining beacon of empathy, and if he weren't perpetually lazy he might've managed a bit of that serial killer vibe, but I couldn't call him _evil_. Would someone like him, or like Lisa for that matter, voluntarily hang out with merciless murderers? It seemed unlikely.

I needed to know more, before I made any sort of decision. I'd have to meet the Undersiders, one way or another, and plan out my next steps. Even Rogues had some time to make decisions, after all.

I moved to open my laptop again, when the ceiling _creaked_.

It was subtle, and I might not have noticed otherwise, but it was there. I waited with bated breath, frozen in place, until the sound came again, this time louder.

_Thump._

There was someone upstairs. In an abandoned house, in a rundown part of town, _behind a locked door_. Lisa would have called ahead, Alec would have smacked on the door with his sceptre thing until I let him in. I hadn't heard the front door break either, which meant it wasn't just some druggie looking for a bed. They had to have the key.

_Shitshitshit._

This was one _hell _of a day for the Nazis to come home.

I rushed to my feet, starkly aware of my predicament. As basements went, this one was well-furnished and luxurious, but it was still a ways underground. There were no windows to crawl out of, and just the one very obvious exit at the top of a staircase. I'd locked the basement door, but there wasn't much I could do to block it off. I couldn't stop a crowbar.

I grabbed my cellphone, texting the number Lisa gave me, hoping my single bar of reception would hold out until I got some kind of response.

**Amalgam  
**_There's someone in the house._

Lisa would get the gist from there, I was sure. I shivered, and a familiar wave of insecurity lodged itself in my bones. I wasn't a superhero, nor a villain, and I didn't know how to throw an even halfway decent punch. Unless my unexpected guest was tremendously out of shape, I wasn't going to outrun them either. What did that leave?

"Think!" I hissed to myself, searching the basement for something that could get me out of trouble. I needed a weapon. Something to hit people with. The wavering light of my phone's screen cast a ghostly glow over everything it touched, but none of it seemed useful.

_Jackpot_.

My hands steadied as my impromptu flashlight illuminated a cylindrical object that was lodged into the wastebin. It was one of Alec's homemade taser-scepters. There was a bend in the metal about halfway down, and the device had been stripped of whatever decorative elements it had once possessed, but it was something. I eyed it warily, reaching for a button that dangled by two wires. Squeezing it with my thumb, a momentary spark alighted between the two prongs of the device, accompanied by a soft but unmistakable hum. There was charge. Excellent.

I'd need the other thing too. A disguise, some kind of mask. I didn't hesitate to rip the gaudy nazi-american flag off the wall, tying it around my face in haste as my heart galloped in my chest. I wasn't much of a cape, but I wasn't going to let the freaking _Empire 88_ identify me before I'd even picked a name.

Some part of me whimpered as I moved towards the stairs, ducking into the darkened corner that flanked it. That terrified part of me was what the trio had spawned, but it didn't seem as strong as it had been. I felt more sure of myself, perhaps even strong enough to put up a fight. Was that what Lisa and Alec saw in me, perhaps? Or had I changed that much already?

Who exactly was I, if I could bend like a reed one day and jump into guerilla mode the next?

I heard a grunt at the basement door, followed by a curse. I held my breath, ducking further into the shadows as I wielded my taser as if it were the world's largest bug-zapper. I didn't really know how to use the thing, but I imagined poking people with the pointy end would work. The door opened, and a thin strip of light cut through the middle of the basement, across the couches and fancy high-backed chairs and landing on the charming bust of some gruff-looking man that doubtlessly killed a great many jewish people. I'd never bothered to look him up.

_Thump. Thump._

My guest descended the stairs without hurry, the beam of his flashlight flittering through the basement and pausing momentarily at the little corner I'd set up for myself, right by the old CRT television. If he recognized things as being out of place, he didn't react.

_Thump. Thump._

He was more than halfway down, now, and I saw his legs appear not three feet away from me.

I saw my chance, and my body moved.

I stabbed forward with my taser-stick, tightly pressing the button that set off the electric charge. I aimed for his ankle, but the taser's sharp prongs stabbed straight through his pants into his shin instead, and my victim _screamed_. His shocked cry was cut off as he tumbled head over heels down the rest of the stairs, trying desperately to catch his fall and failing miserably. One arm snapped with a terrible noise as the ganger smacked into the hard tile floor, and his wailing renewed at twice the volume.

"Shut up! Shut the hell up!" I hissed at him.

I heard rushing feet from somewhere up above, but I couldn't think about that. The idiot tried to get up, lifting himself with his free arm so he could get a look at me, still crying in pain. I stabbed into his arm with my taser, and fired it off at full charge until he fell silent. He was still breathing, but at least he'd stopped making so much noise.

Wait…

What had I just done?

I retreated to my dark corner, trembling like a leaf. I couldn't process it, and didn't try. I'd attacked him without even the slightest hint of remorse. That hadn't been self-defense _at all_.

I wasn't like that, was I?

"What the fucking hell was that racket?" someone asked from above, his voice tinged with some vaguely European accent. "You fall down the fuckin' stairs, man? Are you - _shit_." The shadowy outline of a new person passed through the beam of light that emanated from upstairs. "Fuck. You got properly fucked up, didn't you?"

My phone buzzed, but I didn't dare to read my messages. Not now. I heard more feet somewhere up above, half a dozen people, maybe more. A whole band of gang members, and now they were all coming towards my basement. They talked among each other in what sounded like German, or some other vaguely European tongue I didn't understand.

I tried to stop sniffling, and panicking, and focus on the moment.

I could use a bit more of that scary Carrie me, if she could get me out of this mess.

"I will go down first," the European spoke. "Nils is clumsy, but I don't take chances."

With a whoosh like fire, a blue glow joined a wandering flashlight, and I froze. I suddenly realized an error I'd made. I'd expected another ganger, a neonazi with delusions of grandeur, maybe some muscle. Not someone wielding a baseball bat that sparked with blue fire, wearing a mask depicting an Eagle in flight.

I hadn't expected the Empire to bring their own Cape.

"Nils, you're a fucking idiot," the man said impatiently, kneeling at his fellow nazi's side and poking the groaning figure in his broken arm. "Next time you put the lights on before you -"

The impulse to strike out, to snap, came again, and I followed through. I sprung out of the shadows, swinging at my new target with force. Before I was even halfway to him the cape's bat caught my taser and smacked it aside without effort.

He turned to face me, and the moment he did he _froze. _His face went slack, if only for a moment, and something like fear replaced his former bravado.

"Y-you!"

"Me." I said it with a confidence I felt, accompanied by a strange feeling of growing certainty. I raised my weapon, and almost dropped it in shock as energy engulfed my arm, a green-black mass that arced across my skin and solidified into something which resembled a rifle, before it dissolved into energy once more. I knew this: it was Miss Militia's power!

Why on earth…?

It didn't matter. I'd gotten my moment of surprise, and I used it. I swung Regent's weapon, unleashing a vicious crack of electricity directly to the base of the cape's throat. He didn't cry out, or even whimper. He just collapsed, his bat rolling out of his fingers before he'd had a chance to properly use it. The blue glow guttered out, leaving me in darkness.

Miss Militia's power still fizzed around me, crackling in the air, and for a moment my mind soared at the thought of getting her powers instead. My brain felt like it was on _fire. _The cape on the floor had to have mistaken me for Miss Militia - my mask! I was still wearing the American flag, and in the darkness… My power, useless thing that it usually was, had grasped onto his mistake as hard as it could, reinforcing it all the way. _Awesome!_

Then it all went wrong.

I suddenly felt like I was touching a powerline, or dipping a hand in freezing water, and suddenly painful arcs of black and green power escaped from me, slashing outward into the basement without direction, unstable and wavering wildly. The energy felt slippery, and alien, and caught in the glow were the images of firearms, too numerous to count. Then the cascade of power looped back to me, but I still couldn't grasp onto it. I couldn't manipulate it like she could.

I could imagine Lisa's incredulous cackling, but that didn't help.

"We got a Cape down there!" someone yelled, but I barely even noticed. "Bitch took down Adler! Someone got a grenade?"

Well, nothing spurred on desperation like that.

I rushed into the open, into the light, and unleashed all the power that remained, lobbing the mass of energy straight up the stairway to the upper floors, as far away from me as I could manage. I hoped it would distract them, and for a moment it worked. The wave of green and black wasn't even halfway up before it started to turn into a rain of Uzis and rifles and pistols - and primed rocket launchers. I heard the fearful cursing only a moment before I realized what I'd done.

_Fuck._

I only had time to close my eyes before a wave of cacophonous noise, scorching light and heat reached me, and I joined my two victims on the floor. I couldn't see, nor even hear anything, and the world seemed to sway. I still felt Alec's sceptre in my hand, and I focused on that feeling. I tried to breathe, but it took more effort than I'd expected. The whole basement was filled with smoke, and with a strange flickering only barely visible through my blurry vision.

Flickering? _Fire!_

I scrambled upright, ambling towards the staircase while using my makeshift mask to filter the worst of the smoke in the air, hacking and coughing all the way. The stairs had seen better days, with a giant chunk of the top half resembling little more than rubble. Above that the sky. I could see the _night sky_. The wailing of sirens resounded in the distance.

"Damn it!" I said harshly, glancing back to the two unconscious bodies still on the floor, covered in little more than dust and plaster. They were alive. I wasn't so sure about the people upstairs. As I climbed, I finally pulled out my phone and checked the messages.

**Tattletale - **  
_This is R, T is not around._  
_You need any help?_  
_Respond?_  
_BRT._

Tears ran down my face, though I wasn't sure why. Fires burned all around me, with smoke spiralling into the air. I heard other people, somewhere, but I couldn't focus on them. I just had to keep moving until I was out. Until I was safe. A peal of laughter bubbled on my lips, meaningless mirth born out of shock more than anything else. At least, I thought, there weren't any bodies. Not that I could see. Just a swathe of destruction in all directions, as if a bomb had ripped the building apart like so much cardboard, spreading its neonazi guts across the neighbourhood. I heard yelling in the distance. The sirens seemed closer. I had to leave.

So focused on moving forward, I only registered the swishing noise when it was far too late. Something cracked against the back of my head, and I stumbled forward in a sea of stars and pretty colours, collapsing heavily onto my side. I tasted copper and blue on my tongue, and my limbs refused to budge.

"- for my fuckin' neck, bitch!" I heard, the rest of his words engulfed in the noise of blood rushing in my ears. "- broke his arm in so many damn - electric fuckin' stick - fuckin' die!"

The cape, Adler, swung his baseball bat, aiming it straight at my face.

I couldn't hope to stop it.

In a feat of impossible coordination for my addled brain, my taser swung itself forward into the path of the bat. Before the Nazi could adjust, could do anything more than widen his eyes, it went off with a devastating _zap_. It turned out his bat was made of metal. Adler went down in a tangle of uncoordinated limbs once more.

Had I just done that?

No.

"Alec," I said in relieved recognition, before pretty rainbows and lights threatened to take me away again. As a figure in a hoodie stepped into the clearing, a shadowy shape slipped away in the corner of my eye. I thought for a moment that I recognized it. A wave of renewed dizziness overtook me, and a kaleidoscope of colors whirled me away.

I didn't dream.

* * *

**Shitlist 2.a - Interlude - Sleepless People**

"Am I interrupting?"

"No, no, it's fine." Hannah shook her head as she took in her colleague's red-rimmed eyes, motioning him into the room. "Let me guess. You forgot to get some sleep again? Too busy working, right?"

Armsmaster winced slightly as he entered. "...I'll try to do better. Dragon's already told me off about it." He shook his head tiredly. "Anyway, I thought I'd check up on your progress."

"By which you mean that you felt left out," Hannah observed dryly. "This isn't the first time we meet, Colin."

"I know, I know." He ran a hand through his short-cropped brown hair, his hand reaching for the halberd he tended to carry with him, before he dropped it back down. For once, he hadn't brought the thing with him. Hannah could empathize with the gesture to some degree, as she was never without a weapon herself.

"And…?" she fished. "You must have a reason to seek me out."

Colin held out for a moment, before he sighed. "Alright, yes. I've looked over Shadow Stalker's report," he said. "I thought I could find an easy answer, but it proved more difficult than I expected. I've checked the database for suspects several times, but I haven't really found anything."

"Don't feel too bad. I haven't gotten much further," Hannah admitted. "Aside from our new friend in the basement, of course."

Colin straightened, and even without his armor and halberd he made for an imposing figure. "Yes. The PRT database has him listed as Adler. Possibly Addler, it's not clear. He showed up on the radar a few weeks ago, but he hasn't made any waves. No involvement in any cape fights, and no overtly illegal activity. This is the first time he's merited more than a footnote."

Hannah nodded to herself. "It makes sense we haven't met him. Powers?"

"Nothing too special," he said. "Low-end Striker, and not too creative about it. He induces some kind of mental confusion through touch, which leaves his victims incapacitated for a short time. It might be more dangerous after longer application, but I'm not sure he's clever enough to have checked."

"He's probably another import," Hannah mused. "Kaiser's trying to consolidate his forces against the other gangs, and he needs the force multiplier of more capes, even if they're weak ones." She paced to the window, staring out over the water. "This means he'd gotten four new capes in as many weeks. That counts as escalation, I think. It's only a matter of time before someone gets nervous and starts acting out."

"My money's on Lung."

"Yeah, I'm not taking that sucker's bet."

Colin smiled slightly, and his gaze gravitated towards Hannah's laptop. "Stalker sent you these?" he inquired, flipping through the open pictures at speed.

Each of them depicted different perspectives of a two-story house, thoroughly hollowed out by what had to have been an impressive explosion. The surroundings of the building had been turned into a landscape of pockmarked rubble and burning craters, like a war zone. It was a small mercy that the whole mess had taken place late in the evening on the outskirts of town, which meant the damage was… manageable.

"She was first on the scene, so she took charge a bit," Hannah said. "She handled things well enough, even if I don't buy her excuse for being there." She rolled her eyes. "Stalker wasn't 'just in the neighbourhood'. She was patrolling solo again."

Colin nodded. "I'll bring it up with Aegis."

"At least she called us in, I suppose," Hannah added mildly. "Whatever Adler's deal is, though, I doubt he had much to do with this particular mess." She tapped the screen of her laptop. "Touch-based concussions don't really mesh with giant flaming explosions."

"My thoughts exactly."

"It's hard to argue that Adler wasn't involved in some way. Stalker did pick him up right outside, so that should give us enough leeway to keep him in custody for a while, even if we don't have anything particularly heinous to stick him with." Hannah had been working on narrowing down suspects since the previous evening; sometimes sleeplessness had its advantages.

"Buying time is good. He might slip up again," Colin said. "He's a smaller fish in this pond, so we might want to extend something of an olive branch to him. We could use more information on the person that he was fighting."

Hannah nodded. Unlike the usual giant fireballs, and it was hard to believe such a thing could be considered normal even in Brockton Bay, this latest explosion wasn't just Lung showing off, or someone getting trigger-happy at a rival gang. Instead, it seemed to involve a small-time cape fight between relative unknowns that got out of hand. At least, that's what she'd deduced from what little information was on the scene. After an initial flurry of suspects, mostly hard-hitters from gangs, the investigation had dropped them off one by one, leaving the suspect list distressingly empty. There were some new players on the board.

Unfortunately, their best source about the whole affair was Adler, who refused to give up even basic information about the events of that evening, seemingly convinced Kaiser was going to break him out at any moment. It was a delusional conviction for someone of his relative unimportance, but he didn't seem to agree.

"Are we sure this isn't Empire infighting? There's always been tensions within the gang, and with this many capes all sharing the same city it was bound to boil over sometime." She grimaced. "Kaiser might have bitten off more than he could chew."

"He's not stupid," Colin grumbled. "All this all took place outside Empire territory, which tells me that the Empire was either trying to recapture old turf, or fend off rivals preemptively." He scratched at his beard. "Neither of those would be happening if there was a lot of internal strife going on. If anything, this kind of move says Kaiser's feeling more secure. I'd say that the Empire was trying to take back an old base we never picked up on, but someone was already using it, hence the fight."

"Which brings us to our mystery cape," Hannah said.

Adler had let a few things slip before he'd clammed up, seemingly realizing the bargaining power of whatever information he still had. Still, it was never clever to mouth off in front of Armsmaster, especially when he was recording. Judging from Adler's expletive-riddled ranting, there had been a female cape at the scene. Occam's razor suggested she was responsible for the explosions, but narrowing it down further from there wasn't easy, especially when ABB bomb-Tinker Bakuda dropped off the suspect list.

She'd seemed like a proper fit too.

Colin crossed his arms. "Shadow Stalker didn't report any particular explosive residue at the scene, and I concur with her conclusions. The blast was likely the result of a parahuman power or a Tinker-made device." He seemed to favor the latter explanation, but that was no surprise. "As far as I know, we don't have anyone in town who can manage that sort of destruction short of Lung or Purity. Needless to say, they are both highly visible when they do this sort of thing."

"Well, there's always me," Hannah joked. "Adler said our cape was a 'flag-masked bitch', right?"

That, more than anything, had Hannah intrigued. Shadow Stalker had reported Adler's use of that exact phrase shortly after she'd taken him into custody, and long before Hannah had even gotten involved at all. Between the explosive power-set and a flag-based mask, the new cape could be something of a groupie, or a copycat.

Evil twin, even.

For a mirthful moment she had the mental image of another Hannah grinning maliciously as she stroked an evil goatee - it was unsurprisingly modelled after Colin's beard.

"Of course not," Colin said. "You were on base at the time. It couldn't have been you."

Hannah rolled her eyes. "That, and I wouldn't randomly blow up a building. Thanks for the vote of confidence though, I really appreciate it," she snarked.

"No problem," Colin said.

Right. Moving on.

"Until we get a better description than 'woman with a flag mask', I'm going to hold off on making too many connections," Hannah said. "Being nauseatingly patriotic is a bit of a national trait, so it could just be one of those capes."

There were at least a dozen 'citizen patriot' capes active that Hannah knew about, usually affiliated with government outfits. Many of them wore flags as part of their costume, though state flags were more popular than the national one. There was also a burgeoning trend of newbie heroes copying the last generation. It was generally discouraged, but kids were impressionable. The newest growing trend was to resurrect the names and style of deceased heroes, especially victims of Endbringers, in order to carry on their legacy. Odds were that group would get more relevant as time went on, due to the increasing number of second-generation capes.

Regardless of the specifics in this case, the statistics remained sobering. When it came to new capes who got involved in gang conflicts, far too many of them were found bloody and broken a few weeks later as a message to others. Hannah wasn't sure if she could deal with finding someone dead in her own costume; Alexandria had already experienced that particular scenario, and it hadn't been pretty.

"We should think about reaching out," she said after a long silence. "The Empire can be very unforgiving when it comes to fledgling capes messing with their operations. Especially unaffiliated ones."

"We can't be sure she's unaffiliated," Colin answered immediately. "There's far more independent villains and rogues than heroes. And there are more villains than unaffiliated capes, period. Odds aren't too great, unless she's very green." He frowned darkly. "Besides, this girl very nearly killed six people with that blast of hers. We'll have to take her in regardless. Next time she pulls that, it might be in a crowded mall instead."

"That's remarkably pessimistic."

"I like to think it's realistic," he said curtly. "Nobody died this time - which is the only reason I'm not putting out an arrest warrant right now. Hopefully, this is the last we hear of it. The rest is up to her."

Hannah plopped down in a chair, her hand ghosting across a pistol at her side, just as it changed into something a little more dangerous - a sure sign of her agitation. "Well, let's hope she knows what she's doing."

* * *

"Why did you bring her _here_?" Lisa asked sharply, biting her lip. "This isn't how I wanted to do introductions. With her power, showing her in this state could be really bad."

"I didn't have much choice," Alec snapped impatiently. He removed his mask, tossing it to the side. "The Empire got her pretty good, so I had to intervene. Police was already underway, so I couldn't afford to leave her there, especially since she was wearing a freaking _nazi flag_ for a mask. I think that would've attracted bad attention."

"I'm sure she'll appreciate getting dragged off by a villain when she wakes up," Lisa muttered dryly. She let out a long sigh. "Well, I suppose we can't change what happened. How did the Empire catch onto her, anyway?" She paused momentarily. "Oh, they didn't? A fluke? No, I don't buy that kind of coincidence. Someone arranged for this to happen."

"It wasn't me, or you," Alec said. "Who else knows about Taylor?"

"Nobody," Lisa responded. "Nobody knows about _her _specifically, that is. She was even a mystery to herself before we met. But someone knew that I was using that particular hideout for something. The same person who told me about it in the first place. The boss."

Alex leaned back. "That's just peachy."

"It's… it's something for me to get a headache over, not you," Lisa said. She looked back to Taylor, sleeping off the equivalent of a concussion. "The bigger question is why this happened. I figured the boss might ask me to recruit Taylor at some point, once he found out about her being a parahuman, but this came right out of left field." She shook her head. "I'm not sure if he _was _behind this. I need more information for that. I just know he could have done it."

"Maybe he just set up a bunch of Empire grunts to get smacked down," Alec said. "She flattened them pretty good before I got there. She may have been behind that big explosion on the news, and she stabbed a couple idiots with this thing." He reached to his side, dropping one of his taser-sceptres onto the table. "Pretty impressive, actually. She got a good jolt out it."

"Smart thinking on her part," Lisa said, picking up the weapon - then she froze. "Hold on a minute. Taylor used _this_to shock people? That doesn't make any sense…?"

Alec nodded slowly. "I strip all the expensive shit off those when they break - no reason to drop money on parts that still work, you know. The battery's the most expensive bit of the whole thing, so of course I removed it." He cocked his head to the side curiously. "The thing still worked, though. Better than it usually does, actually. It got that last fucker to dance pretty good."

Lisa didn't comment on that, but the spark lighting in her eyes said enough. "Did her power stop giving off bad vibes? How'd you get her here without, you know, going all Hannibal Lecter?"

"Nah, it's still there. And you ever play one of those zombie games?" he asked, miming rickety and uneven movements. "She got knocked around the bend a bit, but my power still worked fine. I got her most of the way here on her own two feet. Not sure if she was aware of that, but I kinda doubt it." He shrugged. "The moment I let go, she dropped like a rag doll."

"Yeah, that's not creepy at all," Lisa said.

"This seemed like the safest place to stash her," he said. "If that old Empire base was compromised, I couldn't be sure about any of the other addresses you gave me. Figured here we could at least fight back if some asshole got trigger-happy."

Lisa ran a hand through her hair. "Yeah, but what are we going to tell the others?" she asked. "We can't tell the truth. If I'm right, the more of us are in on that, the more unstable Taylor might get. She's not doing that great to begin with. I can't do the whole 'awesome Thinker-Trump' bullshit either while she's bedridden. You can imagine what Rachel would think."

"Rachel doesn't have to believe she's some kind of Brute to respect her," Alec pointed out. "Thinkers and Trumps don't have to be imposing to be terrifying."

"You think I'm terrifying?" Lisa smiled thinly. "You say the nicest things!"

He just stared at her with something like annoyance. "Look, as long as we make sure to mention the part where her powers can get stronger, she should probably be alright. Explains relative weakness now, while still excusing any future power."

"Not too scary, and accurate enough to get away with," she said. "I can work with it."

"Is she still going with Amalgam?"

Lisa shrugged. "She'll probably pick something else when she goes public, since there's already -" she suddenly paused. "Shit. Shit. I forgot she was working on something. Probably was typing away when she got attacked down there. Odds are the hardware was left behind, since I'm not seeing you dragging laptops around…"

"Too late to go back for it now," Alec said.

"So the PRT knows," Lisa stated glumly. "That makes things more difficult. If they go public with something about Taylor - especially the _wrong _thing - it could screw things up pretty badly. We need some kind of authoritative statement in her favor before the PRT gets a chance to speak up." She nodded to herself, straightening. "I've always wanted to be an authority on something - might as well get started now. I guess it's time for Amalgam to go public!"

She opened up a laptop and started typing. Sleep was for the weak.

* * *

"Stalker."

"Reporting in, and all that." Shadow Stalker dropped from the rafters in a puff of shadows, slowing her descent just enough to touch down softly. She looked like hell, but Hannah refrained from commenting on the girl's obvious exhaustion; she was far too aware of the hypocrisy given her own habit of pulling all-nighters - even if she did have a good excuse. Everyone was playing night-owl, it seemed.

"Armsmaster confirmed the identity of the Empire cape you captured, and we tracked down the stragglers you reported. They wandered off to nearby clinics to get something for their burns. None of them offered much resistance." She nodded. "Nicely handled."

"Didn't do much. All the action was over by the time I got there." She dropped a backpack on the table, slightly wet from morning dew. "I just came back from the scene, actually."

"You went back there?"

Stalker shrugged. "It's my scene. I thought I'd case the place, see if the Empire left anything good behind when they got out. The cops didn't mind."

Hannah wondered when she should call up Colin about this. "You didn't ask anyone here for permission?"

"Eh, I left a message." She dug into the backpack. "That's not the important bit, though. Triumph -" She paused. "Aegis is gonna whine about it, and I'll probably have to listen to some more bullshit about protocol, the usual shit. It's not really that interesting." She retrieved a rectangular box from the bag and held it up triumphantly. "I hit the jackpot, though."

"You took that from the crime scene," Hannah said. Of course she did.

"Yeah - there was a laptop lodged under the sofa. Must've gotten knocked to bits by the explosion. The screen was broken, most of the rest too. Cheap piece of crap." She dumped her bag on the ground carelessly. "Look, that stuff's junk. This isn't." She held up the harddrive, loose wires still dangling from it. "This still works."

"Which you_ took from a crime scene_," Hannah said sharply.

"I asked Armsy - he said it was okay."

"_When_?" Hannah demanded.

She smirked. "Left a message."

"Stalker!"

"Alright - alright," she said, raising her hands. "I called him like forty minutes ago. I think he was busy tinkering. I don't know if he really heard me, but I have his grunt of agreement on tape." She gestured towards the bag at her feet. "The PRT guy at the site also signed off on this stuff, so I'm good. Papers are in there, with the signatures and all that rot."

Hannah wondered if she should start jotting down her complaints and annoyances, because they were piling up today. "So what's got you so interested about this? I didn't think you liked to get involved in this sort of mess."

"Eh." She leaned forward slightly. "Tell me - have you ever heard of Amalgam?"

"Not… really?" Hannah admitted. "I think I heard Vista mention that name."

"Yeah, _she _would know," Stalker said with a scoff. "Skinny is this - there's this rumor going around on PHO, about some new cape in Brockton Bay, probably a Thinker. She got internet-famous for writing articles about all sorts of other cape stuff. Goes by Amalgam." She tapped the hard drive again. "And I think I just found her laptop."

Hannah blinked in surprise. "You're saying this belongs to a brand new Thinker cape?"

"Pretty sure," Stalker said lightly. "I'm guessing that the cape who blew up the slums is probably some hired muscle. If I were a Thinker I'd want to have someone to back me up, you know? Bit of brain and brawn?" She held out her salvage. "You can probably figure it out based on what's here - I can't be bothered going through it all. Just give me credit, alright?"

"I'll have Armsmaster take a look at it," Hannah murmured as she took the device. "...Well done, Stalker. Even if it's not exactly by the book." She sighed. "_Again_."

"Who cares, if I get shit done?" She left without looking back. "Later."

Hannah stared after the Ward, puzzled. Since when did Shadow Stalker play glorified delivery service for the PRT? Or, more precisely, when had she stopped complaining about it?

Maybe things were finally looking up for her?

* * *

**Shitlist 2.2 - The Undersiders**

I woke up in an unfamiliar bed, something I'd gotten rather used to. My first thought that I'd been dumped in a cubicle, because the walls simply stopped a little ways up, leaving ample room between there and a lattice of metal girders that supported the roof high above. The walls were grey and bare except for a few shelves full of cleaning products and rags, and there were a half dozen mops propped up in the corner.

"I'm in a closet?" I asked myself blearily, propping myself up on my elbows. My head throbbed with a dull ache, but it felt like the worst was behind me. It had to be remnants of a truly monstrous headache. What had I been doing to cause that? Something important?

Oh. Right. Super-Nazis.

"_Fuck_."

I jumped off my makeshift bed in reflex, my heartbeat thundering in my ears. I remembered entirely too much. For a minute, I held onto the vain hope that it had all been a nightmare. It all felt unreal, and that was something of a relief. There had been explosions, and guns, and - wait, had Alec _really_rushed in like a dashing savior of damsels in distress? Wow. Was I now dreaming about _him_? That would require some serious soul-searching, since I was pretty sure I wasn't into skinny absent-minded loners. Weird.

"Get yourself together," I told myself. "Panic later."

It hadn't been a dream, of course. That would have been too easy. Which meant I'd somehow escaped from a bunch of asshole neo-nazis through a combination of freakish luck, outbursts of my inconveniently unpredictable superpower, and the assistance of the aforementioned skinny absent-minded loner. It was all real. It was also thoroughly fucked up.

I looked down at my hands, which wouldn't stop shaking. Honestly, it wasn't just because of my headache, or the aftereffects of baseball bat guy's power. No, it was because I remembered everything that happened in that basement, and I couldn't make sense of it. My actions didn't feel like mine, and that was altogether terrifying. I'd never stab someone in the shin on purpose - but I'd definitely done that. Hadn't even thought twice before doing so. I'd also blown up half a dozen people because it seemed necessary at the time. With, like, rocket launchers.

I'd never been a vicious pragmatic. Not like that. Was that the kind of person I was, now? Had I turned into a killer overnight, just because my best friends were supervillains?

The urge to hysterically giggle was hard to suppress.

Deep breaths. No hyperventilation and fainting today. Not here, not now. I had to focus on something else; anything else. Right. If Alec saved me, this had to be his place. Their place - the home base of the Undersiders. I'd planned on meeting up with them soon, but not this way. It was alright, though, because I could probably leverage this whole mess into something productive, probably, if I stopped panicking so damn much.

Okay. That didn't sound like me at all. Not even close.

"Panic. Later," I breathed.

I was still alive, at least, and that was something to hold on to. I'd made it out of that deathtrap of a basement without getting riddled with bullets, and I'd worn something approximating a mask so I was pretty sure none of the Empire goons would be able to identify me. I'd made it out of there before the authorities arrived, too. Things were bad, but they weren't that bad.

_Who the fuck am I?_

I shivered. My whole stream of consciousness didn't feel familiar. It was cold, and clinical, and experienced beyond reason. I wasn't any of those things. But maybe some people thought I was. That could be enough, right? Was this what Alec thought of me? Not Lisa, at least. Maybe just the Empire 88? They could make a difference. Of course, since I was thinking about my powers, perhaps my PHO-induced super-geekery was involved too.

Fucking hell. I had to stop thinking about the philosophical implications of all this before I drove myself crazy. Replacing panic with dispassionate reason wasn't something the original me could have done - her emotions didn't have an off switch. Which was a sobering observation, because the very fact that I was drawing a distinction between current and previous me was disturbing. It was the worst word I could muster about the situation - which was considerably more disturbing.

Fantastic. Now I was applying my power's effects to analyze my power's effects. I had the distinct feeling that this kind of recursive nonsense was a great way to amplify my headache. Fucking Thinkers. Where was Lisa? She could stand in for a therapist.

"...I _am _Taylor Hebert," I told myself, focusing on what was important. It wasn't like much of my previous life was left - perhaps it was fitting that not all of my previous self was either.

I really needed a therapist.

I looked to the door of the closet, and pushed on. I could probably fake courage long enough to leave, and find somewhere to unleash some justifiable vandalism on a dumpster or three. Maybe then I'd feel better.

"I'm still myself," I said.

I opened the door.

The Undersiders' place was a little underwhelming. My closet-slash-room was bordered by a few more cubicle-shaped bedrooms, all of which were open and without occupants. Adjacent to them was a large central area with two couches facing an enormous television, as well as a few coffee tables and other odds and ends. Empty pizza boxes were piled up on one of the tables, and nobody had cleaned in at least a few days judging by dust gathering in clumps along the back of the couches. This was supposed to be a supervillain hideout?

"...Hello?" I asked, my eyes darting from side to side. I stepped outside and relaxed when nobody jumped out of the shadows at me. The hideout, it seemed, was just some big building's upper floor - the very back was set up as a kitchen, while I was in the middle. Cutesy pictures of dogs and other things decorated the various doors, which seemed entirely too silly to be the work of hardened criminals. It was very - teenager.

"Ah, you're up!" someone said, jarring me from my thoughts. I jumped a little in surprise when a pile of clothing on the couch sat up. I'd complete missed the black boy sitting there, dressed as he was in similarly dark clothing. I'd been outsmarted by the almighty camouflage potential of stylish t-shirts. Brilliant.

"Hello," I said, and I pushed myself to walk closer - I couldn't come off as too shy.

"So, you're the mystery girl that Tats has been courting," the boy said, and he smiled encouragingly. "You can call me Grue, if you like. Professional pride, you know."

"You're not wearing a mask."

I'd expected masks. Lisa had told me they'd be wearing masks. Had I just stumbled into accidentally unmasking a villain?

Grue inclined his head. "You make a good point. You don't have one either, though, and I don't know your name either. Fair's fair?"

I raised a hand to my face, belatedly realizing I'd entirely forgotten to take that into account. It was rather too late to worry about it now, though, especially since Lisa and Alec already knew pretty much everything. "...I hadn't even thought about it," I admitted, looking at Grue nervously. I walked closer, my hands in my pockets to hide their trembling. "I don't really care for the name 'Amalgam', but it'll do for now. It was actually Lisa's idea."

"She has those," Grue said with a hint of derision, gesturing towards the other couch as he leaned back into it. "Don't wake the lady, now. She probably needs the beauty sleep after the nights she's been pulling. Sometimes she tuckers out in the middle of the day, even."

I glanced over at her and sighed. That was two for two on lacking any sort of observation skills. Lisa was sprawled out in a slightly awkward position on the other couch, propped up on two cushions with a laptop by her side. One hand still rested on it from when she'd moved to close it, but she'd apparently never quite managed.

"I found her like that," Grue confided. "I don't sleep in here normally, so I just got in half an hour ago. Lisa called me last night, but she wasn't very coherent about what happened. So I came in a little early." He smiled. "Figured I might run into you sooner or later, but I didn't expect you to take a nap in our guestroom."

I snorted, sitting down on the far end of Grue's couch, far enough away to avoid my power's nastier side-effects. "Trust me, it wasn't voluntary."

"I got that much from Lisa's text," Grue said. "Nice to meet you, anyway. I heard good things from Lisa - even if she's very circumspect about you."

I nodded. "To be honest, Lisa's been a bit of a lifeline for me. I was in a bad place when we first met, and she helped me to move on some. Gave me a place to crash, all that. It didn't work out so great."

"Something about the Empire 88?"

I grimaced, thinking back to the first man I tasered in the leg and face. "Yeah. They - well, they broke into my place. The place that Lisa arranged for me, at least," I said. "I'm not sure exactly how they found me, but they had me cornered, and there was nobody around to help. I still got out of there, but…" I hesitated, glancing up at him. How could I put this?

"Yeah, I get the picture. I've seen the news," Grue said morosely. "It sucks." He stood up and made his way to the mini-fridge set up in the back of the room, retrieving two bottles. "You're okay with coke, right?" he inquired, but he didn't wait for an answer. "We're not really well-stocked on anything else at the moment and -"

"_Stop_!" I leapt away from the couch before he could reach me, raising my hands in a defensive gesture - Grue stopped midway, tensing at my jump. I'd avoided him from stepping blithely into my 'turn people evil' range, but how was I going to explain this without sounding like a completely drama queen? Shit.

"Uh -" Grue said. "You okay?"

"I'm alright. It's…" I hesitated for a moment. I needed a good way to explain this without letting on to the worse aspects of my power - that's what Lisa told me. "Okay. You know Glory Girl, right? Not her invulnerability thing, but the aura that makes people feel afraid, or in awe?"

His eyes widened with understanding. "You have the same thing going on?"

"Kind of, yeah." I shrugged helplessly. "I'm still new to this superpower thing. Haven't really figured out how to change the range much, or turn it off. Helpful stuff like that." I winced slightly, thinking of the plans Lisa had made about this whole meeting, and what I'd just blurted out. "So far, Lisa's the only one who's unaffected by my power. Vice versa too - thinker stuff kind of slides right off." Lisa had said something about thinker immunity. Would it work?

"Huh. I thought you were a Thinker from what Lisa let slip," Grue said. "But that aura thing sounds more like a Master power to me."

"That's what Alec said. But there's… more to it," I said. "A lot more."

He nodded. "Okay, wow. A grabbag cape, huh? Neat." He sat down on his previous spot, leaving my bottle of coke on the table. "No offense, but I kinda figured Lisa was geeking out over meeting someone like herself, and that's why she was always slipping out. I suppose it doesn't really matter. Welcome to the team, vaguely troubled Thinker-Master-whatever girl."

"Oh, I'm not -" I hastened to explain.

"She's not joining the Undersiders," Lisa said in a monotone. She didn't even move from her position on the couch. "Amalgam's independent - a Rogue. Heroic tendencies, so don't spill too many of our dastardly schemes. Though I'm confident she won't slip our identities to the white hats."

My eyes went wide. "I wouldn't!"

"Of course you wouldn't," Lisa said, and she finally sat up, shoving her laptop aside and running a hand through her hair. "You're good people."

"Wait," Brian said with a confused frown. "You're not even a villain? Seriously?" He glanced back at me and looked decidedly less comfortable than before, which seemed so hilariously backwards that it almost made me smile. "So what is this all about?"

"She's my friend," Lisa said. "Told you, didn't I?"

"You have friends? I'm surprised you don't have more enemies."

She glared at him. "Fuck you."

Grue didn't even react. "Actually, I figured you were playing the long con for recruitment. That's sort of what you do."

"Oh, I totally tried that," Lisa said far too easily. "It didn't work out. Amalgam's a little outside our pay grade. Let's keep it at that." She winked at me. "I've been introducing her to some of the basics of being a cape, helping her out with a few bits and pieces here and there. Unwritten rules, all that rot. I make for a pretty good researcher, too." She smirked. "Now, so does she!"

"What does that even mean?" Brian demanded.

Lisa shrugged. "It means that she's been a pain in my rear for weeks, and now I can foist her on the rest of you. She's basically invisible to my power, and I'm pretty sure the same goes for other Thinkers - or I'm sure I wouldn't be the first one to walk up to her on the street. It's what got me interested in the first place." She bit her lip. "There is also the aura thing - you already know about that. Anything new you wanna add to the list, Amalgam?"

"Uh..." I said. "Well, I kind of pulled a Miss Militia last night. That counts."

"That's what that was?" Her eyes alighted with misschief. "It does explain all the wanton destruction you left behind." She furrowed her brow, and sighed for effect. "Honestly, did you have to go overkill? Pretty sure something rather more sedate would have done fine."

"I didn't have a choice!" I protested. Wait - wait. Lisa was doing the manipulation thing. I knew that. I could do that. "They had a lot of guns! Guns seemed like the obvious response. I figured a little quid pro quo would be appreciated, but there was just a lot of screaming and cursing."

Nailed it.

Okay, where the hell had that come from? Did I just channel Lisa?

"Can you two stop being cryptic on purpose?" Brian demanded. "I've got enough on my plate with one Thinker."

"Yeah - about that," Lisa said slowly. "You have to understand that at the time I said that, it was entirely what I believed. Technically, I think it was even sort of true." She raised her hands in surrender. "Okay - let's not blow this out of proportion and make a big deal out of it. My power didn't work on her, so my conclusions were a little shaky."

"So, you invited her here?" Grue asked sharply. "Someone you can't vet?"

"Pretty much," Lisa agreed. "Of course, I vetted her in all the ways that don't require a superpowered brainpan. So there's -"

A door slammed open somewhere below, and I heard a dog barking.

Lisa paled. "Shit. T- Amalgam, here's what I want you to do -"

She didn't have time to tell me anything as three snarling dogs rushed up the stairs, drool flying everywhere as they made a beeline for me. Grue yelled something I couldn't make it out as I tipped backwards over the couch, away from the snapping jaws and barking. The Rottweiler followed me over, raking at me with its claws and nipping at my throat with its teeth.

For a moment I thought it would find somewhere to take hold - when it suddenly bugged out, whelping like I'd kicked it and scrambling wildly across the floor to get away, its tail between its legs. The other dogs seemed suddenly hesitant to approach, and I caught my breath.

"What the _fuck _did you do to my dog?" someone yelled as I jumped back to my feet, my heart still racing as the other two dogs snarled. I knew their owner from her from the picture - Hellhound.

"I didn't -" I started, but Hellhound didn't let me finish.

"Take her down!" she commanded.

"Call off the fucking dogs!" Brian yelled, trying to hold a German Shepherd back, something like liquid shadow billowing off of him. The animals bolted at me again, their nails scratching across the floor as one tried to approach me from the side while the other came straight.

"No!" Lisa and I cried at the same time. I threw up my hands to guard my face, turning away. There were two sharp cracks. I felt those - for a moment, I thought one of the dogs had jumped right into my hands. Then Hellhound whistled sharply, and everything stopped.

Nothing hit me, I realized, except for recoil. I held two large pistols in my hands, heavy and powerful, and they glowed with ethereal greenish light. Miss Militia's power again. I'd gotten those for a moment because a thug mistook me for the hero - but that was it. Why on earth would it return now? Thankfully, my flailing shots had missed Hellhound - but only barely.

"Back. Off." I stated it as forcefully as I could, keeping her in my sight as my hands trembled around the grips of the pistols. I'd never actually used real ones before, and my previous experience with Miss Militia's power had been explosive. I had no idea if the things would spontaneously detonate in my hand like the others.

"Fucking hell! Everyone chill the fuck out!" Brian exclaimed at last, the goopy darkness around him fading away. "Every goddamn time you do this, Bitch!"

Hellhound sniffed, but she and her dogs stayed put.

"Ooookay. That could have gone better," Lisa said carefully, glancing between me and her teammate, pausing on my weapons. "Amalgam, you can put those away now. Bitch, please don't aggravate the nice Trump lady, alright?" She let out a deep sigh. "Brian... I swear I texted her about the whole thing. Twice. I made sure she wasn't in."

"Hell of an introduction," he murmured darkly. "Think we pissed off your friend there."

Honestly, I wasn't angry. I wasn't thinking much at all, probably from the shock. I wondered if I'd really just heard Brian and Lisa call Hellhound a bitch to her face. I questioned whether I would have just taken the beating before, or if I would have returned the favor. I asked myself if my personality was getting overwritten by popular consensus, or if I was still myself. I contemplated whether my powers belonged to me, or I to them. But I wasn't angry.

Halfway through lowering my two pistols they evaporated into greenish-blue light. I wasn't confident I'd be able to conjure them up again, and I wasn't going to show off my inexperience to the cape with the pack of angry dogs at her beck and call, so I crossed my arms.

"Okay - that was a little more excitement than expected," I said more lightly than even I'd expected, and Lisa's baffled expression was one to treasure. Judging from Brian's relieved nod, the attempt at levity worked. "Nice-ish to meet you all, I guess. Lisa calls me Amalgam. I don't like it. You're - Hellhound?"

She scoffed. "The PRT calls me Hellhound. I don't like it. Bitch."

"That's her nom de plume. Her cape name," Lisa explained.

"Yes, yes, I got the French, thank you," I said. "So… where do we go from here?" I considered the Rottweiler that attacked me - probably a mutt, actually - and the fact that it was still cowering on the far end of the room. What had done that? "Just for your information, I'm not joining, and I'm not too keen on debuting alongside villains. Independents can use all the help we can get, including from the heroes. Don't want to burn bridges."

Bitch narrowed her eyes, but didn't comment.

"We'll let you set your own image, obviously," Lisa lied shamelessly. "I'll even slip you some information from time to time, if it's relevant to rogues. In return, you leave our operations alone. Not all villains are total assholes, and sometimes we can use a little mediating with the good guys. Vice versa too, I guess." She smiled. "You're already keeping like half this group's identities a secret, and now we pretty much all know yours too. If you fuck us over, quid pro quo."

"Stop speaking French already," Bitch muttered. "It's simple. If you leave me alone, i leave you alone. Unless you hurt my dogs. In which case I'll fucking kill you." She said it flatly, but I believed her. She took off towards the third dog, and the other two followed behind her, though both of them glanced back at me. I figured that was about the best I could have expected.

"...Right," Grue said slowly. "So… we cool?"

"We're awesome, actually. Who's asking?" Alec peeked his head out of one of the cubicles, wiping at his eyes. He was wearing truly hideous pyjamas, but didn't seem to care. Everyone just stared back at him. "...Soooo, what did I miss?"

I could have left.

After introductions, and snarky comments, and Alec being an entitled asshole who hogged the television for himself, there really was no reason to just hang out with villains all day. Even if they were remarkably easy to get along with, save for the appropriately named Bitch, it remained a strange experience. Brutus - the dog I'd scared half to death - eventually recovered from his fright, but his newfound wariness of me just made Bitch less interested in approaching me. Which I was totally fine with.

I could have left, but I didn't. I went outside, intent on finding something else to do with my day, but I just ended up crashing on the nearest bench, too wired to think coherently about my life, my powers, or where I would go. I didn't even have a laptop to lose myself in.

Someone approached from behind - I could hear the footsteps. "Hey, Lisa," I guessed.

"Oh, that's nice. Fuck me, right?" Alec responded, his hands in his pockets as he kept his distance. "I only saved your ass from half a dozen angry German-wannabes. Little gratitude, you know? Seems like I earned it."

I rolled my eyes. "Alright, alright - fishing for compliments? Thank you for helping out. Not sure I would have gotten out without you." I nodded at him. "I owe you one."

"I'll make a note."

"You do that," I said, staring out into the sky. The silence stretched out, and finally I turned back to him. "Tell me, what the hell am I supposed to do, Alec?"

"Huh?" he asked, apparently genuinely surprised. "What?"

I scowled. "Lisa's got all the plans in the world, but I think last night demonstrated that the real world is just going to find a way to mess with them anyway. I don't know Grue, or Bitch - not beyond their wiki pages, so I can't really expect them to contribute much. I can't go home, and with my power as it is I won't even try for the Wards." I shook my head tiredly. "And I know fuck-all about being an independent cape. I'll be back fighting some Empire assholes within the week, and I don't want that."

"And you're asking _me _what to do," Alec said. "Seriously?"

I nodded. "You're not nice, but you don't pretend to be. I'm too friendly with Lisa not to let her influence me, and she knows all my weak spots. She'd have me sign up for the team within the month." I shrugged. "I'm not sure it wouldn't work. With my power being what it is, popular opinion would probably sway me."

"Fuck that," Alec snapped, and for a moment I thought I saw anger cross his face. He'd never been like that since the times he was in my range, and I edged away. "I don't care what kind of fucked up power you have - you're not gonna give Lisa the satisfaction. Or anyone. If you want my opinion, I'd vanish. We've already talked about the faked suicide thing, we could probably figure that out. You leave town for somewhere nobody knows you, and debut as whatever you want to be. Hero, rogue, villain - who cares. Start over."

I could only think of dad. "I can't… can't just leave," I said. "Brockton Bay isn't much, but it's… it's my home."

"I don't really do homes," Alec said matter-of-factly. "I'm not nostalgic, I'm a pragmatist. Kind of have to be, in my line of work. I've learned to cut ties." He shook his head. "You shouldn't take advice from me, honestly. I'm not a role model in the least, and you seem like the kind of person who cares about things. That makes my ideas… difficult."

"You can't tell me you don't care about things," I objected. "Not after last night."

He looked away. "Don't turn that into more than it was. I did what was necessary. And for the love of God, don't get it in your head to crush on me. Seriously. It doesn't end remotely well. Ever."

"Don't worry. You're not my type," I said lightly. "Actually, come to think of it, do you know if Grue is single?" I snickered at his expression, and luxuriated in the feeling. I hadn't really felt that way for months, and it was still great that the trio's grip on me was fading.

"I'll let him know."

This time my middle finger came up without any help from Alec.

"There's something else," he said, reaching into his pocket. He retrieved a phone - or perhaps it was a tablet of some sort, given the size. "Lisa's been running damage control after your little stunt with the Empire. You left your laptop behind, so she had to scoop the PRT spin before it could even be published, that sort of thing. Your power is what it is, and you were out cold. There weren't a lot of options. Some control is better than none." He tossed the device over. "She used your account to do it. PHO pretty much knows you're a cape now, so if you want to keep messaging without being harassed, you should probably get a new account. Sorry."

I stared at the phone. "She's been posting in _my name?_"

"The Amalgam one, yeah. Which is why you should probably read your recent history," Alec agreed. "She had to try and mimic your posting style and everything. She was a nightmare to be around, kept complaining about headaches while actively making them worse. Real genius."

I opened PHO, hesitant about what I might find, but thankfully Lisa's posts were relatively short and light on details. The bare bones of the attack were there, including oblique references to dealing with the Empire thugs more harshly than I'd hoped, and it listed me as an independent rogue who hadn't chosen a name yet because I kept out of fights. There was nothing there about specific powers. Actually, there was a certain… brevity to the whole thing. Perhaps it was some of Lisa's experience slipping in, cutting out all the dross in favor of only the juicy details that had to be shared. It read like I'd been doing this sort of thing for ages.

I suppose I now knew where Cold-and-Experienced-Me came from.

There were forty-seven pages of discussion in Lisa's thread alone, and hundreds of private messages were waiting for me. At least three of those were from mods, and several were apparently reporters looking for a scoop. At least two were from the PRT, requesting information on the attack and inviting me to join up. Others… were rather more disturbing.

"...I think I have fanboys now," I gritted out. "What the hell did you _do_, Lisa? _Fuck_."

"We've all been there," Alec said dryly. "Still, at least you're immune to her power now, judging by her complaints. Small comfort. I think it'll be about an hour or two before she starts regretting ever mentioning that." He reached into his pocket and retrieved a bottle of what seemed to be beer. "Cheers."

"I could probably use that drink," I said.

"Too bad."


	5. Shitlist 3 - 4

**Shitlist 2.3 - Self-Reflections**

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**Welcome to the Parahumans Online message boards.**

You are currently logged in, Amalgam

You currently have _2_ tags: (The Gal in the Know) (Unverified Cape)

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**Topic: MEGATHREAD: Parahuman Debut of Amalgam**

**In: Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion ►**

**Alathea **(Original Poster) (Moderator: Brockton Bay)

Posted On May 27th 2011:

Well, that happened!

This Megathread has been created to stop the constant spamming of Amalgam threads over the last few hours. Yes, I know. _One of us, one of us _and so forth. They' re still cluttering up everything. I will be closing any other threads that cover this topic within the Brockton Bay section of this forum. Any attempts at releasing personal details of Amalgam (or anyone else) will be harshly penalized with a permanent ban, as conformant to our doxxing rules, and will also be reported to the relevant authorities. Remember that anonymity is a right here, even for capes - _especially _for capes.

For those who have been hiding in a basement, a quick summary of events: Valued PHO contributor and resident cape expert Amalgam has decided to reveal her personal status as an independent parahuman via PHO - this claim is unverified at this time. She also described the experience which led her to this confession, namely a gang assault by local white supremacist gang 'Empire 88' upon her person, from which she was thankfully able to escape.

We request that you be respectful to the victim of such a harrowing event, particularly if she decides to participate in discussion.

Current news coverage:

_PRT Press Release_  
_Brockton Bay Gazette_  
_Paranews  
Capes Anonymous_

**(Showing page 3 of 85)**

**►Erato**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

I ****ing knew it! (Also First!)

Why no details on her power? Easy to say you're a cape, but I dunno... Make a pic lifting a truck or something, that otta do it, right? Easy peasy lemon squeezy

BTW why did my thread get locked?

**►ConVicOdin **(Banned)

Replied On May 27th 2011:

[Content Deleted by Moderator]

**►vv-Gigaflame-vv**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

Damn to the 50th power! Stop the presses, BB is _still _cape central in the US of Ayyy!

Any idea what kind of costume she has? What powers? Or what cape name? Do we know anything beyond that she's a cape? Dammit all! I require information to fuel the eternal engine! FML :

BB REPRESENT

**►LargeWaterMelons**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

That's awesome, another new cape! Tentatively _not _an asshole, so I count that as a win.

I hope you're alright after that Empire business, Amalgam, and I wish you the best in whatever career you decide on! Unless it's being a murderous villain, then I won't. Deal?

**►4Ever_Four**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

[Content Deleted by Moderator]

**►Sierra_Hotel_Niner**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

I, too, wish you luck in future endeavors!

The label you picked is interesting, btw. 'Rogue' is the language used when someone's going commercial/corporate (for various historical reasons) while mercenary tends to be more villain-affiliated. You picked 'independent' instead. It's just so nonspecific - the kind of thing you'd call yourself if you wanted to the cape stuff, but hoped to avoid getting the government all up in your grill with recruitment offers or punches to the face. Scoping out the field before joining in?

Coyote-C, the thread has opened less than ten minutes ago. How is there _already _rule 34 stuff!? Jesus Christ.

**►Kamtutz**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

WOO! Since I posted the speculation thread about her being a cape, I'm not gonna say I told you so, _but_...

The cat's out of the bag! Gammy's a cape! She's been circumspect about answering that question since the beginning, so she probably just didn't want to burn any bridges. Maybe she wasn't careful enough, though, if a gang went after her? I've heard it's a common problem for rogues and indie capes, and it's worse for those without physical powers to fend them off, like Thinkers. Hope she can join the Protectorate or something. 'Protect' is literally in their name.

For those who missed the locked thread w/ Amalgam's comments & the ensuing discussion, what we know so far is that Amalgam was caught in a compromising position sometime last evening. That's easy to deduce from the fact that she started posting around midnight, and she described her run-in happening a few hours earlier. We also know that there was a sizeable explosion that evening, with dozens of residents reporting hearing a loud bang near the Boardwalk. The PRT cordoned off a few blocks around that time, and two Protectorate heroes were spotted. The connection is obvious, I think.

The PRT press release describes it as a gang-related altercation in which a non-chemical explosion was detonated. The cause is undetermined, but presumed to be parahuman-related, since there's no reason the PRT would be involved otherwise. There were a couple casualties, but none more serious than cuts or burns. Most of the damage was structural, with one building getting blown sky high. The PRT response suggests that the victims are gang members, if not in so many words, since it calls them 'participants' of the altercation rather than onlookers.

In short, general assumption is that Gammy got cornered by the E88 as she described, inside that destroyed building. Her admission of being a parahuman might be to stay ahead of bad press, since it seems she's got some destructive power which she was forced to use it in self-defense. Doesn't want to get an instant villain label for the big boom, I imagine.

OTOH the ongoing assumption is Thinker powers, given Gammy's habit of writing doctoral level studies in a lazy afternoon. Seriously, that's gotta be power-stuff or she's full-on genius too! How many Thinkers do _you _know who are high-end blasters on top?

Thoughts?

**►Arale **(Fanfiction Aficionado)

Replied On May 27th 2011:

I'm sensing an oncoming vs. thread! I guess there's not a lot of feats yet to base it on, however… and I'm not sure many capes will be taken down by well-written articles. Maybe she can write a sweet treatise riddled with spelling errors and give Accord an aneurysm?

**►Incoherent Guttural Noises**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

Did not expect this, I admit. I'm gonna say this in my own defense: jumping to the conclusion that someone is a cape should only happen _after _other options have been exhausted. Most people are mundane, and most smart people are not thinkers of any kind. That this one happens to be doesn't mean it's a good rule of thumb. Anecdotes aren't data, people!

I'm gonna guess she's a kind of Blaster, if this explosion stuff is related. That would make the smarts just a result of being educated and having some ins with the cape community. Not superpowers. That'd work.

EDIT: Sorry, removed the bit that was uncalled for. Thanks for not deleting this post outright!

**► FencerFeline**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

IGN - Of course you'd pick that option, then you can be wrong and yet _still _be right at the same time. Sneaky!

I'm just gonna say that it's super-exciting to see Amalgam reveal her cape status online! I don't know how much that happens, but I thought usually they did it in real life, stalking the streets for robbers or something, and got in the news a couple times before they came here? Amalgam was one of us all along! How cool is that? Talking to a cape and never even knowing. Wonder if I should go back and see what she's said in her old posts?

EDIT: Hm, her Mind Games thread is also her first post... nothing to see, really. ...Ooooh does she have alts?

**►4Ever_Four**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

I apologize for the crude words in that deleted post, I guess? I was editing it, but the moderators are too quick. I'll try again with the wrongspeak cut out so the pc mods allow it

Gosh darn, my cousin got blown by this blooming lady yesterday! He said she was wearing a cloth on her face instead of a mask, so prob no costume. I admit cuz is kind of a blooming derriere, but I think he was telling the truth, what with that doomed egg on his head. Got hit pretty hard by the blooming shockwave!

... okay now?

**►Beat-Bro**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

Glad to hear that you're safe, Amalgam! I can't imagine how scary it is to get attacked like that… I gotta ask, have you considered joining the Wards or the Protectorate, depending on what age you are? Solo capes don't have it so well, and they could help you in case the Empire tries again. Strength in numbers, you know.

Are you going to keep 'Amalgam' as your alias? It sounds enough like a cape alias, though I don't know if it's taken.

**►JENGOROTH**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

Power speculation-a-go-go! I've been going over this one for a bit, basing it on Amalgam's screen name here on PHO, given that there's not a lot else to go on. Right. 'Amalgam' means an alloy of Mercury and some other metal. Most common one is old fashioned dental fillings which have silver in them. So something metal-related, maybe?

Let's see… Mercury is a metal obviously, the liquid one… but it's also the name of a planet, and the name of a deity. Pretty sure they all trace their name back to that god, actually. And here's where it gets interesting! Cos y'know what kind of God he was? He was into financial gain and commerce $$, eloquence, poetry, messages, communication, traveling, luck, boundaries… A lot of things actually, but I think the 'Messenger God' bit is the most obvious in relation to a thinker power. Considering she's been posting a lot of heavy duty cape studies to be read by normal people… she's like a messenger from parahumanity, huh? See what I'm laying down here?

How about the metal connection? Mercury is association with death (yikes), transformation and mystery, as well as scrying (which I guess could mean information gathering?) Silver is supposed to be a 'feminine' metal, whatever that means, which stands for purity, intuition, self-reflection and inner wisdom. Honestly the symbolic meaning of silver here is too perfect.

So what I'm guessing it's supposed to mean is that she's a rogue (if commercial gain is important) who has a power related to information gathering. Something like grabbing important info out of thin air or whatever, which is why her articles are so freaking good and have all sorts of obscure stuff in them? I think I got that right.

I'll be a fiver that this was on her mind when she picked that name!

**►Merovingian**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

[Content Deleted by Moderator]

**►Vocabulary**

Replied On May 27th 2011:

So does anyone know if New Wave still accepts members? Cause as independent capes in BB go, they are pretty much the go-to example, right? I mean, they're Protectorate-affiliated I guess, but they're still their own thing. Or are they just a family outfit these days? I don't keep up with that stuff.

End of Page. 2, 3, 4 ... 83, 84, 85

* * *

I leaned back in my chair, rubbing my tired eyes. The internet was helpful as ever, but at least people were sending me good vibes. I tried to refocus on the screen, but the letters blurred together. I'd been at this too long. I still had eighty-something pages to go… in this thread. And every hour half a dozen pages seemed to pop into existence, much of it in far-flung places I wouldn't think to look. _Fantastic. _I didn't blame Lisa for unleashing this storm, really, but I couldn't help resenting her a little for leaving me to clean up all the fallout.

My debut as a cape was… underwhelming. In a way I felt cheated out of the stereotypical dramatic moment that involved standing over some thugs I'd just beaten up and introducing myself to a policeman in the coolest way I could manage. Maybe it would involve a badass landing from a rooftop or something, fist to the ground and cape flapping in the wind. I didn't get to any of that. Right now, I was the cape equivalent of an internet celebrity. Eugh.

To make matters worse, Lisa had done a good job. Maybe _too _good a job. I still hadn't left a single message in any of the threads, doubtful I'd ever be able to match the bold and decisive version of me that Lisa had spun together. Not without overplaying my hand. PHO trolls would instantly recognize that I was some impostor and smell blood in the water. I imagined they would, anyway, and that was enough to scare me off.

I shoved the laptop aside, and resolved not to think about it for a while. A long while, if I could help it. I turned my attention to my home away from home. It was a barren warehouse with little more in it than two chairs, an old camping table, and a ratty second-hand mattress. Not exactly stellar lodgings. I'd been using it for the better part of three weeks, wary of getting anywhere near my _actual _home. It'd been three weeks since I'd spoken to anyone except the Undersiders and the random nobodies that spammed messages at me online. Thank God this place had electricity, or I might as well have crawled into a cave.

My phone buzzed - an older model mobile that Alec found lodged between couch cushions - and I took note of the fresh alert that appeared at the top. 'Observation time' it noted in friendly green letters. I pulled out a notebook, flipping past dozens of filled pages to a blank one. No notable mental changes, though perhaps I felt a little calmer than the previous evening. Hard to pin down, that. I jotted down the observation, following it up the standard 'No physical changes.' That left powers.

"Guns on!" I said dramatically, flicking my hands upwards and trying to call up Miss Militia's power. Nothing, not even a sizzle or spark of black-and-green power. Had that power faded altogether, or was I just not understanding how to bring it to bear? Both times I'd managed it, I'd been in immediate danger, but Miss Militia was pretty much always armed, so that didn't seem to match. Perhaps she just thought she was in danger all the time? Nah. She seemed way too composed for that.

"I'm still most useless cape ever," I grumbled, quickly underlining the 'calm' in my book. Grumbling was mild as reactions went. Was this calm power-related, or just me getting used to disappointment and frustration? Whatever. Time for a check-in.

I sent a quick message to Lisa:

** I might be calmer today? Not sure, no big changes**

It took mere moments for a reply to appear.

** kk, no news good news, Alec says hi**

I doubted Alec had done anything much more than sniff when Lisa prodded him for a message, but I took the gesture in the spirit it was intended. Alec didn't _do _social interaction, and I could relate. Spending months inside your own head made it hard to fault others for their self-absorption.

My phone buzzed again.

** cu tmrw**

I smiled at the briefness of the message; if Lisa shortened her text messages any further I'd need _her _power just to work them out. Knowing her, she'd help me get it, and then smile maliciously every time I got a headache. Witch.

Putting the phone away, I worried at the familiar paths my thoughts were following. Everything seemed to go back to powers and parahumans. They were on my mind a lot, lately. My own power remained a source of frustration and confusion, as I still didn't get the particulars of how it functioned. Was it related to proximity? How much people's opinions meant to me? Maybe it depended on how I was feeling at the time? The guns had come out in a moment of desperation, so maybe Adrenalin was a turbocharger for my power? People like Lung seemed to rely on that.

Turning my cape geekery on my own power had been Lisa's idea, and not a bad one. I did learn things: I'd gathered information on Master and Trump capes, started two new papers for PHO, theorized and speculated on a vast array of possibilities, and still hadn't gotten any closer to having proper answers. Frustrating, to say the least. The biggest issue was not the Master aspect, which was explicable by power standards. Mind controllers were common enough that there were at least five major villains who fit the description in the Americas alone. The Thinker part wasn't that unusual either; plenty of people got generic intelligence boosts or information gathering tools, including Lisa. That left the most elusive and dangerous of the bunch: the Trump power.

Power as the people demand.

My power knew what other people thought about me, and then _acted on it. _Somehow, some way, my power was making decisions in my stead. How? How could a superpower make choices? Wouldn't it need to grasp what was going on? Wouldn't it need intelligence? Lisa had said powers were dumb. Were they, really? What _were _powers, exactly? I tried not to let the thought of a maybe-intelligent mind-controller lurking in the back of my head bother me.

My gaze returned to the screen of my laptop. "All these worries, and still no new powers..." I complained, though my heart wasn't in it. It was a relief, honestly, to know that idle banter on the internet wasn't capable of radically re-configuring my personality and powers. Apparently my power counted someone mistaking me for someone else in the dark, but not hundreds of people speculating online_. _Arbitrary. It wasn't about needing my real identity for it to work, since the Undersiders hadn't known about it. Too many degrees of separation in this case? Too vague in specifics? Maybe my power just didn't grok the cyber?

Drowsiness threatened to drag my eyes closed, but I forced them back open. Night was closing in, sure, but I hadn't eaten yet. Crackers didn't count. I pushed myself up from my chair and threw on something relatively clean, hoping I'd pass muster on the Boardwalk. It was a bit on the pricey side there, but Lisa had given me spending cash, and everywhere else was just too close to the gangs for comfort. Adler was back on the streets, and he probably had it in for me.

I tried not to let that bother me either.

Hemmed in by my own neuroses, I decided I needed a breath of fresh air. I strolled out onto the backstreets of Brockton Bay, locking the warehouse behind me with a bike lock. It would do in this part of town. It wasn't gang territory, as such - the closest villains were the Undersiders, unsurprisingly - but it was still technically the 'bad' part of town. All the boarded-up windows made it all too clear this place hadn't seen a cash infusion since the last administration.

I imagined the money was spent on places that _didn't _have endemic gang problems featuring super-Nazis and actual dragons.

Right. Fresh Air. The Boardwalk. Distraction. Food.

The streets were quiet, the last few stragglers heading home as the day drew to a close. There were a few tourists, recognizable by their cameras, bags, and unusual interest in the bay. Someone from security gave me the stink-eye, his gaze lingering on my hair before he moved on. I couldn't help it that I lacked a mirror or daily showers. I could get those at the Undersiders' place, but I tried to avoid spending too much time there, just in case.

I walked up to the balustrade, gazing out over the waters of the bay. The distant sight of the Protectorate Headquarters seemed almost to beckon, and it was the obvious place to go with problems like mine. I'd been hesitant to reach out to the heroes before, fearful that my aura was going to make them enemies the moment I ran into them, but surely they'd worked with cases like mine? Glory Girl had an aura that made people afraid of her, and she was a hero! On the other hand, I'd spent an afternoon reading up on Master capes, and… Lots of Masters were villains, _especially _the human-controlling ones. I already knew two or three of them. And none of _them _turned allies into enemies on a dime. None of them were walking, talking liabilities.

"Fuck."

My power was dangerous, I knew that much. Just because I'd managed to avoid brainwashing people for two weeks, didn't mean I was safe to be around. The heroes would realize that too. Would I be allowed in the Wards, or would I just get locked away for the safety of others?

Whatever. I'd been considering the independent cape route, anyway.

I paused, a chill running down my back at the thought. How sure was I that it was my own, really? Lisa had called me independent in her PHO posts - to leave my options wide open, she said. But being independent was already a choice, wasn't it? It meant _not a hero or a villain _in common use, and if that's what people believed, wouldn't it bias me against other options? Had she done that accidentally? On purpose? She was a villain, so she had a vested interested in keeping me off the straight and narrow...

Glancing down at my hands, I noticed that I was shivering. It didn't feel nice to think ill of my friends, even recently gained ones. But how much of that was her convincing the other Undersiders that I was her friend, thus forcing me to play along? Would I even notice that kind of manipulation? Who the fuck was I? Playdough for every passing stranger to squeeze in whatever shape they needed? And I couldn't be sure if this paranoia was even natural, or just more power bullshit!

I grasped the balustrade, squeezing until my knuckles turned white. I yelled something, something unintelligible or unconscionably filthy into the wind, just to know that I still had control over my voice_. _It felt good to let out my frustration, and all I got in return was some weird looks from tourists. I'd received worse walking between classes. The thoughts crowding in my head were shoved aside to make room for a mindless, howling feeling. Rage, maybe. Against powers. Against the world. It was better than wallowing.

Was this _me_? I always felt like me, even when I _wasn't _me. Would I forget who I used to be, and go wherever the wind took me? Could I hold onto the important bits? Had I changed a lot in recent times, or had I just grown up without realizing it?

The breathless moment ended, and I stepped back. Fuck. _Fuck _all of that. Practical things were what I needed right now. No existential crises, no worries stacked on top of more worries. I needed something tangible. Independent capes, that's what I was thinking about. Parian was the one to mention in Brockton Bay, so that's who I would contact. She had a website. I found her contact form, composing a halfway decent email before I could rethink it. Message written. Message sent. I was locked in. Hopefully the me that would show up to the meeting hadn't gone villain.

My hands were still trembling, still cold.

"Uh… Are you alright?"

I froze. Seriously? I glanced over my shoulder, and saw a brown-haired girl staring at me, her hands clasped behind her back. She looked vaguely familiar, though I couldn't begin to guess her name. Five-and-a-half feet away - outside my range. "Hi. You're not here to take me for a cup of tea a block or two over, right?" I asked mildly.

She blinked at me in confusion. "No… Um, you're Taylor, right? From Mister G's class?"

I nodded slowly. "Last I checked."

"You haven't been to class," she said, looking over my clothes and doubtlessly drawing all the right conclusions. "I saw you standing here, and I thought…" She shook her head. "I'm not sure what I thought."

I shrugged, trying to recall if I'd ever spoken to her before. "So, what do you want?"

She bit her lip nervously. "I guess I wanted to - apologize." She nodded to herself, and seemed to find some sort of confidence in herself, straightening her posture. "There's something I've done, or _haven't _done… You've heard of the Bystander Effect?"

Ah. I met her gaze, and knew what she was here for. I could almost feel it. She was looking for absolution, wasn't she? She was from my class, so that meant this was about _school,_ and the only thing worth apologizing for there was obvious_. _She'd witnessed the bullying, the destructive cycle that the trio and I had been in for so long that it had become part of my very being. She'd seen it, and done _nothing_. But a lot of people had seen it and done nothing. That's what people did. I tried to conjure up some malice, some vengeful anger. I couldn't. The emotions weren't there.

She was a symptom as much as the bullies were, part of a bigger story.

I shook my head, and that floating feeling of detachment faded. The conclusion remained.

"...I forgive you," I said finally, and I meant it.

The girl blinked, staring at me like I'd grown antlers. "What? What do you mean? Just like that?"

"Yeah, pretty much. I never blamed you. Any of you," I explained after a tense silence. "Emma and Sophia… They share some blame in what happened. So do I." I considered my words carefully. "But... I've moved on from there. From them. Left that part of my life behind."

_Left that part of _me_ behind._

Silence lingered. Finally, the girl relaxed. "Damn. You've gone very Zen," she said. "Emma said you'd cracked - didn't know what she meant…"

I snorted. "Emma said that? Figures." I could see that happening after our little run-in at the school gate. I'd barely even thought of her since, too focused on other things. "What did Sophia have to say?"

"Eh, she hasn't been around much. Emma's inconsolable. Before that, though? She said you'd snapped." She grimaced. "Said you were one of those people with a hair-trigger who could go from shy nobody to vicious psychopath in an instant. Pretty menacing stuff, on the whole."

That… sounded far too familiar. I could almost feel Alec's taser back in my hand, lighting up with sparks as I viciously stabbed it into an Empire thug's leg without the slightest hesitation. _Zap._

The girl seemed to get something from my expression, because she blanched. "No, no! I know it's just gossip, that it's Sophia trying to put you down! Most of us didn't believe it, you know. I figured you'd hit her back, and _good for you!_"

I nodded, thinking of that moment I'd slammed Emma into the wall - Alec hadn't helped with _that._ "You're not wrong." I paused, frowning to myself. "I'm sorry, but I don't think I remember your name."

She smiled. "It's Charlotte. Three seats to your side in Mister G's class."

I didn't remember her. "Why _did _you seek me out, Charlotte? You weren't involved."

"Yeah, but…" She paused, grimacing. "Look, I spoke to Madison." The name barely even fazed me. "She told me a bit about what happened outside the school. She's… different, now. I don't know what happened to her, but I think she got _hurt_." She looked down at her feet. "I think it was Sophia, honestly. She did something, and now Madison is afraid of her. But she's even more afraid of _you. _I don't know why. I thought…"

"You thought I would know why," I said, and I wondered what was going on with the third wheel of the bullies. "...Alright. Want to talk about it over tea? It's getting chilly, and I could use a bite to eat."

Charlotte sagged in relief. "Sure."

"Not here, though. The Boardwalk is pricey." I smiled. "Don't worry, I know a place."

* * *

**Shitlist 2.4 - Conviction**

There was a certain therapeutic quality to this moment, I decided, sipping from my steaming cup of tea as Charlotte nattered on about schoolyard politics and annoying teachers. This was just so thoroughly normal that it felt downright nostalgic. It was the kind of thing I'd missed in recent weeks - or recent years, even. I tried to ignore the complicated feelings that roiled inside me, constant reminders of my treatment at the hands of Emma and the others, and focused on the moment. Right now, right here, none of that mattered. I was okay.

Charlotte wasn't half as nervous as I was, of course. She'd flopped bonelessly into a chair the moment we entered, then started gushing about the cute little shop that Lisa had introduced me to. She openly admired the charming scenery that I'd mostly ignored. Obviously she was playing up the cheerful attitude to try and counteract my dour mood, but I resolved to suppress any twinge of annoyance I might've felt at that bit of harmless manipulation. Charlotte wasn't responsible for any of the things that happened to me, and I had no reason to resent this girl for what Emma and the others had done. Her worst sin was not acting, and that was a sin we shared.

I'd done far worse - I'd forced those three into keeping things going, after all, even if I hadn't meant to. Fucking powers.

And there those thoughts were again. Powers. The veneer of mundanity couldn't last long, could it? Cape thoughts dragged themselves back into my mind, an ever-present background murmur of weird worries and fears. Why couldn't I stick with normalcy for a little longer? Was I just not cut out for it anymore? Maybe I hadn't felt normal in so long that I'd gotten suspicious about the whole concept? I couldn't help but suspect super-powered trickery, even when there was none.

Was this my life now? Ever-encroaching paranoia about my dubious sanity?

"Taylor?"

I blinked guilelessly, glancing up at Charlotte. "Yes? Yeah. I'm sorry. I was a bit distracted there," I stammered, blushing at my faux-pas. She didn't seem offended. "I'm sorry, you were saying?"

"They think it's gang ties," she stated, and I felt utterly lost in the conversation. Where had that come from? What had I missed that would lead from random school nonsense to talking about freaking gangsters? "...That's what Sophia said to Madison, at least," Charlotte continued, giving me some semblance of a clue. "She thinks you're involved with one gang or another. Not sure where she got that idea, but maybe it's her own brainchild? Seems like her kind of thing." She shrugged. "You shouldn't read too much into it. It's probably just the worst they could come up with."

I nodded slowly, still wondering when innocent chatting had turned to these uncomfortable topics. Maybe I should've stayed in la-la land. Still, I could kind of see where Sophia was coming from, in a detached sort of way. She had suspected the involvement of the Empire 88 at the school gate too, hadn't she? A laughable idea, but I did get two shady white kids from outside school to back me up against the popular black girl. Didn't look great from the outside.

I paused as a fearful thought occurred to me, and I shuddered with utter revulsion. I really, sincerely hoped that my power would never make me racist by proxy. Now that would be a headache and a half to deal with! "To be perfectly clear, I am not in any gang," I stated belatedly, perhaps a little more forcefully than I should have. Real convincing, genius. "Nor have I ever been."

Charlotte smiled. "I knew that. You don't strike me as a druggie or a Nazi, and unless you're hiding a really interesting family tree, you're not Asian either. That covers most of the bases around here, really..."

I snorted. "What would a gang even want with a lanky 15-year-old with trust issues?" My voice cracked halfway through, and I winced.

Charlotte seemed to consider my question seriously, peering at me with strange intensity. Why would she do that? What did she see that I didn't? I fidgeted in my seat. Finally she nodded to herself. "...Yeah. Good point."

Alright. What was that about? That weird expression bugged me. Had she somehow figured out I was a cape? That's the thought that jumped to mind, at least. Was that the reason she sought me out? Maybe she was just waiting for me to bring it up? No, that would be quite a leap of faith, especially since I barely knew her. I forced myself to focus, and to dismiss the paranoia. I was probably overthinking this, and extrapolating from way too little information. Lisa would've told me off for that mistake.

"...Do I want to know what that look was about?" I asked at last. Okay, so much for subtlety.

Charlotte cocked her head to the side. "Eh. Probably, but I'm not telling."

I stared and tried to figure out what was going on in this conversation. Whatever I'd hoped to notice in her voice or her expression, some dramatic tell or sign of her disposition, just wasn't there. She was a really good actress - or I was a really poor judge of acting prowess. "I'm too sober for this conversation," I joked, turning back to my tea.

Silence fell, but it wasn't the strained kind. Charlotte sipped at some herbal mixture I wasn't familiar with, occasionally glancing my way with that strange expression. Maybe she was trying to divine some sort of tells from my face too? Weird. The momentary lull in conversation allowed me to center myself.

"I'm…" I started nervously. "I'm probably not coming back to Winslow. You get that, right?" I looked down at my drink, watching the bubbles swirl as I twisted my spoon. "I finally got out of there, and don't feel like going back. I've got enough self-control to study by myself without exposing myself to more..." I sighed. "More of that."

Charlotte nodded. "You've been gone for a while, so I kind of assumed. I figured you'd just write yourself out at the end of the school year." She smiled. "I have thought about doing that once or twice, but there's no way my parents would allow something like that." She smiled. "You're living the dream, huh?"

Some other people's dreams, maybe.

These days, it seemed that was enough.

I tried for some honesty. "Look. There's… things going on with me. I haven't been at my best." I felt a little lost about where I was going with that thought even as I was voicing it. "I haven't really spoken to anyone, much less someone I don't really know." I shivered. "Thanks for that, by the way. This stuff is cathartic, kind of."

A warm hand suddenly landed on mine, squeezing tightly. "Any time." I looked up in shock. Charlotte smiled, squeezing once more, then let my hand go. "Just say the word and I'll swing by for another cuppa. You gotta have someone in your corner, right?"

I stared at her, starkly aware that she was only a few feet away from me - well inside my power's range. Where was the inevitable deluge of vile words, hateful expressions?

Charlotte seemed to interpret my stunned silence as some sort of response, and nodded sharply. "I'm not kidding about that, you know? Don't let those bitches get to you again. You've escaped from them. That's the important part - you're out. Now, you can find yourself again. Everything else is just willpower." She winked at that. "Or so the self-help books say."

I scoffed. "Not sure a bit of store-bought self-confidence is gonna cut it here."

Charlotte smiled. "You say that, but you just claimed you had the self-control to finish school by yourself. Seems you've got the right idea already," she said slyly. "You just have to remember there are people you can depend on, even if they're hard to find. Other people that could share your burden."

I looked away with a sinking feeling in my gut. "...Ah. I see where this is going."

Charlotte sighed. "No, no. I'm not saying you should trust me. We barely know each other! You should find someone you already trust, and confide in them instead." She paused for a moment, then pressed on. "The alternative is to do the complete opposite. Search for advice from people who are not invested in the slightest, who have no personal connection to your issues at all."

I thought of Lisa and Alec, wondering if I trusted them with my problems because of this fresh personal connection we built up over the last few days, if I just sort of tolerated them because they'd already figured stuff out, or if they were just a convenient target to vent at. I wasn't sure, honestly. I put that aside, focusing back on Charlotte's words. "What do you mean by that, exactly?"

Charlotte grimaced. "Well… This might sound really stupid, but have you ever considered calling a helpline or something? I know they're seen as a bit…" She waved her hand vaguely. "You know, there's a lot of spiritual mumbo-jumbo out there, but there's good ones too. Legitimate ones. My mom called one dozens of times in the eighties - credits it as helping her through the most difficult time in her life. I probably wouldn't have existed without that. Worth a shot, you think?"

Yeah, that really didn't sound like my thing, at all.

She picked up on my disdain and rolled her eyes. "Hey! Don't knock it 'till you try it!" she warned. "Everyone needs a little help sometimes. Doesn't have to be a telephone thing. I'm sure you could find stuff online, or wherever else. Places to get advice from other people who've been in the same situation you're in - whatever it might be. There's nothing new under the sun." She shrugged. "You could do it anonymously, if that's the issue. Nobody would even have to know."

Charlotte seemed weirdly insistent about her advice, and suddenly I wondered if my power was spreading its influence in some brand new mind-controlling way. According to Lisa, my 'aura' reflected my power's image of myself. If the 'hate-me' vibe had suddenly gone away, what might have replaced it? Was I emitting 'I need therapy badly' signals?

...Could I see Dad again?

"I'll consider your suggestion," I agreed at last, trying not to show my unease too openly. "Nothing ventured, nothing gained, I suppose."

* * *

**Unknown Number: **Five-hundred quid worth, third drop point.

**Unknown Number:** That alright with you?

**Adler: **Sounds good. Do you have what I need?

**Adler: **Or are you wasting my time?

**Unknown Number: **Ain't getting involved any further than this, you understand.

**Unknown Number: **Cape shit is not my business.

**Adler: **Yea. It's mine.

**Adler: **Answer my fucking question.

* * *

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* * *

** Topic: MEGATHREAD: Parahuman Debut of Amalgam**

**In: Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay Discussion ►**

**Alathea** (Original Poster) (Moderator: Brockton Bay)

Posted On May 27th 2011:

(Showing page 144 of 146)

**► FencerFeline**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

So has anyone actually spotted Amalgam in the wild? Like, does she go out in costume at all or does she just use her mysterious powers to make internet articles and blow up random gang members that drop in on her?

I'm kinda curious here, I'll be totally honest. Also I want to do fanart and it's really hard to do that rn...

**► CleverPunHere (Banned)**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

[Content Deleted by Moderator]

**► Lestre**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

I heard this from a friend of a friend, but apparently Amalgam was pretty banged up in that explosion, stumbled out, tased a nazi, then got escorted away by someone else, probably some ally of hers. No ID on the mysterious helper, but apparently it was a scrawny person in some white frilly shirt thing? That's all I know tbh.

I'm not aware of any superwomen in Brockton who could blow up buildings short of probably Miss Militia, but I rather doubt she was involved. Drawing a blank here...

**► HellLionArt**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

If that's true, then maybe the second person was also a cape? They could be the one who blew up the house instead of Amalgam & that's why everyone's so divided on her powers. There's two different capes involved!

Would explain a lot honestly, though I guess it does mean there was a bit of friendly fire involved there. Although Amalgam got out, so no harm no foul?

I'm still banking on Thinker or Trump or Tinker or something T for Amalgam, so I'm pasting the big Blaster label on frilly shirt girl!

**► BeatBro**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

Does anyone know if Amalgam can be reached in any way, some sort of public email address or the like? I don't really feel comfortable sharing my thoughts with the entire internet, but sending an unsolicited PM feels overly pushy & it's probably turned off anyway to deal with spam...

**► OrderDude**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

Haven't actually seen her online since the E88 thing. Might be laying low.

**► Purgatory**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

I mean, wouldn't you? Bunch of neonazis try to kill you, I'd avoid the public eye for a while, especially a public place like PHO. Who knows if anyone can track IPs from here or something? I mean, not saying you could but what if?

**► Amalgam** (The Gal in the Know)(Unverified Cape)

Replied On May 29th 2011:

BeatBro : I added you to my approved contact list, so send me whatever you needed to tell me on PM. If that turns out to be terrible stuff, I'll just block you again.

EDIT: For everyone else, there's now AmalgamPHO which I made as a quick and dirty solution. I will respond to messages that actually seem worthwhile to respond to, and block everyone who sends those other kinds of messages. Please keep it civil.

**► AntiDash**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

Holy crap, Amalgam spotted! It's been a couple days, are you alright? Can I PM you too?

**► 4Ever_Four**

Replied On May 29th 2011:

AntiDash : given that she explicitly approved only BeatBro, who asked a hell of a lot more nicely than you did, I'm gonna guess no.

But you are right, it has been a while since we had an actual online sighting of our favorite cape nerd in the know - what's been happening, Ammy?

**End of Page. 1, 2, 3 … 144, 145, 146**

* * *

** Private message from Amalgam:**

**Amalgam: **Alright, you've got my attention. What's up?

**BeatBro: **Uh, right, I'm not comfortable sharing real names online, that's why I made this account. So, I'm BeatBro I guess? I was kinda hoping I could get some advice, and since your main contact point with the world is PHO...

**Amalgam:** What kind of advice are you looking for?

**BeatBro:** Okay, so, from what I've read, you're an independent hero in Brockton Bay, which would make us colleagues.

**BeatBro: **Except, you know, I have no idea what I'm doing.

**BeatBro: **So I was kind of hoping you could help a brother out.

**Amalgam: **Colleagues?

**BeatBro:** I don't really punch Nazis if that's what you're asking, though I think Merchants are cut from the same kind of cloth, and I've punched those.

**Amalgam: **Huh. I wonder if it's just as satisfying.

**BeatBro:** Hah, probably! I'll let you know if it comes up.

**Amalgam *New Message*: **Alright, I looked on wiki, and it wasn't hard to narrow down what your cape identity had to be, between being in Brockton Bay and using that screenname. It's nice to meet a fellow hero, but I am not sure if I could be of much help with cape advice - at least until I figure out my own situation a little more.

**Amalgam *New Message*:** For the moment I'll leave this communication channel open, and if you send me a quick email I'll flag your replies as urgent so I'll get to them quickly. We can exchange information and get some idea of each other before we consider any sort of IRL interaction. I'm not going out in costume atm so we probably wouldn't run into each other anyway, but general courtesy, right?

**Amalgam *New Message*: **A first bit of advice, though, learned the hard way from recent events - be careful about hideouts that seem too good to be true. They probably are. And if you spot Nazi memorabilia, leave immediately. You'd think I wouldn't need practical experience to teach me that one...

* * *

My mobile phone felt heavy in my hand. I'd been staring at it for the better part of half an hour, fingers hovering over the screen. Dad would be home around this time. He would pick up. He would. But I wasn't sure what I'd even say to him. Even if I wanted to tell him about my powers, I certainly wouldn't do something like that over the phone. What were my options, exactly? Make some distant promise that I would eventually work up the courage to face him in person? Apologize for doing something for reasons I couldn't explain, and he wouldn't understand?

I couldn't find the right words, or even the right thoughts.

I slipped the phone back into my pocket and frowned up at the ceiling, staring at the parallel lines of the stainless steel girders that gleamed softly in the reflected light of the streetlamp outside. This… wasn't how I'd planned my life. Taylor Hebert: Super-Hobo. And yet, I hadn't felt this relaxed for the better part of two years. No school to worry about, no Emma to mess with me, no expectations from anyone, not even my weird supervillain acquaintances. Homelessness, it turned out, kind of suited me.

Which really told me all I needed to know about my old life. Fuck it.

The edges of the warehouse blurred together. I didn't wipe the tears out of my eyes, didn't stifle the sobs that were working their way out. What was the point, these days? I felt lost, unmoored, a ship without a sail on a roiling ocean, pushed around by currents I couldn't hope to control. What could I do, really? What should I do? What did I even want?

I raised my hands and once again tried to summon magical guns from the firearm dimension. I tried to reawaken that spark of Miss Militia's power I'd wielded twice before. I got a whole lot of nothing. Powers - they were a double-edged sword that ruined whatever sense of normalcy my life might've had, but I hadn't been a big fan of that existence anyway. And a double-edged sword was still a sword. My powers could be a weapon, a tool to use, an asset to leverage. I needed to get a grip on them before I ended up hurting someone again - including myself. Before I ended up a statistic. After that, I could get to the rest. Get my life back together.

I could join a team, maybe. Become a superhero.

I smiled at the thought, tears drying on my cheeks. I should remember that nobody really knew about Taylor Hebert, secret hobo super-person. All they really knew was Amalgam, my online identity turned cape persona. I'd already gained some notoriety with that title even if it was mostly because of Lisa and the internet's teeming unwashed masses. ...Okay, so calling them unwashed was a bit hypocritical at the moment. _Yuck._

Still, what could I do with this spot of fame? Plenty of people were guessing at my powers on PHO, but I still hadn't noticed gaining any new ones from their speculation. There were probably so many random and contradictory stories that no significant number of users believed any of them - there wasn't enough critical mass for their beliefs to roll over into a fact. That was a relief, in its own way, since it meant I wasn't the plaything of every random person that passed me by.

Just_... just some of them._

Panic. _Later._

Right. _Right._ I'd have to break pattern if I wanted to make actual use of my power. I had to make the rumor mill work for me, somehow. The most obvious way would be to claim some specific power on PHO, and then wait for that information to have a real-world impact. Unless I went for broke and claimed to be Scion's little sister, I'm pretty sure a fair chunk of people would believe my post on account of my good reputation. Then, of course, I could provide further proof by using the newly acquired powers in public, and everybody else would get on board.

I'd gotten to the seed of a plan, at last.

I grabbed my phone again and browsed to the Parahumans Wiki, accessing a list of power categories. I couldn't pick some random power, if I was going to do this - it'd have to be something that fit with Amalgam's previous actions. Unfortunately those actions included being an enormous cape nerd and blowing up a building full of Nazis, which didn't really have the greatest overlap. Oops.

I ditched Brute or Blaster powers right away - my spotty control over Miss Militia's gun-fu told me that I'd definitely end up outing myself before the week was out if I got any more of those spectacle moves. That worry also crossed off a bunch of other categories, so I focused on the less immediately visible types of powers. Thinker abilities made the most sense since they were what people already thought I had, but they'd be pretty difficult to demonstrate, and they wouldn't explain the explosion. Something more versatile would make sense, a Trump power, but those were pretty rare and would invite more scrutiny.

Still, I really _was _a Trump, so it wouldn't even really be a _lie…_

I scrolled down a little further. There was another versatile category of capes that I should consider - Tinker. Tinkers needed resources, which wasn't really something I had access to, but their ability to create devices with a vast number of uses could be an easy way to justify all sorts of weird powers. Or a way to fake them in the first place. Hm.

Looking for some external input, I texted Lisa.

**Amalgam**

_What do you think of trying for a tinker pwr?_

**Tattletale**

_Tinker would be useful but expensive, but can fund as true member - hint hint_

Well, I could have predicted that response.

**Tattletale**

_what specialty are u thinking tho?_

Right. I'd almost forgotten about that. Tinkers had a thing they did. Something peculiar to them specifically. Armsmaster had his fancy halberds and body armor, Kid Win did flying skateboards and laser guns. I wasn't sure what Gallant made, but it probably involved his armor. Almost nobody was a generic tinker who could just do anything. Hero and Dragon were closest to that, I guess, and then there was Leet - though all his stuff sucked and blew up.

**Amalgam**

_not sure tbh, considering options. Suggestions?_

I thought back to the basement, to that moment when I'd briefly become a stone-cold badass with Miss Militia powers, and wondered how that sort of thing looked to the outside observer. Some sort of power mimicry? Cosplay superpowers sounded pretty neat, but that idea would probably be too powerful to believe. Way too many nerds would instantly demand I dress up as Alexandria or Eidolon, or maybe they would start a gold paint fund.

Shit, what if that worked, though? For a moment, I tried to imagine the scenario, and a chill ran down my spine. All of Scion's power in my hands, to direct where I wanted. The entire world would turn my way, a billion people praying that I was the perfect solution to all their problems. The conviction of a multitude focused on that one hope - an end to the Endbringers.

Would there be anything left of me under that kind of pressure? Or would I be some mindless zombie hero, solving menial problems at the whim of every random person on earth? The thought lingered, a terrifying, sickening thing in the back of my mind - because I wasn't sure if it wouldn't be worth it. For the sake of the world. If it saved everyone, what was my life worth?

Oh, Jesus Christ, I sincerely hoped I hadn't just figured out Scion's deal.

_Fucking hell._

**Amalgam**

_I imagined power copying and freaked myself out_

_Gonna stay away from that for now thanks_

_Could do something vaguely similar_

_What do you think of a tinker that affects powers?_

_Power imitation or augment_

_Tinker/trump would explain everything_

_Not as immediately scary right?_

**Tattletale**

_Uh girl_

_You should think that through_

_Power copying with prereqs is still power copying_

_And now you can do it for other people_

_Too OP pls nerf_

_seriously though you are pushing things_

_power + more power = even more OP_

_Would get every gang on your head + prt + worse_

I sighed. She was probably right. Power copying was pretty bullshit any way you slice it, and Tinker powers were also known to be pretty effective, so any combination was bound to be powerful too. Maybe I was being too greedy here, too presumptuous, trying to swing for something so strong. It'd be nice, though, to be powerful enough not to worry about mundane things. To have the freedom to focus on whatever the hell I wanted to do. To be Alexandria, untouchable by the world. I'd already screwed myself up with my own power, so why couldn't things go my way for once?

**Amalgam**

_Do you have better ideas?_

_Tinkers ramp up, so I could start simple_

_Build up over time like most do_

_You call me OP all the time with my actual power_

_So I'm only lying about specifics here_

**Tattletale**

_I know damn it_

_You're super unfair_

_You just have to consider that tinkers are picked up early_

_Too vulnerable without prep and resources_

_You'll need some kind of support_

_Trumps are rare and usually powerful, makes it worse_

_Add protectorate interest if you're any good at either_

_You are already in e88 cross-hairs anyway, so already in deep shit_

_Sorry_

**Amalgam**

_Well, that's comforting._

**Tattletale**

_I know right_

_Let's face it_

_If you go for this you need allies_

_Doesn't matter PRT indie heroes or mercs or villains_

_Doesn't have to be us_

_But someone_

_Trust me on that at least_

I mused over Lisa's messages, wondering about my lack of fear at the prospect of facing the gangs, even by my lonesome. I knew I would've felt scared before all this started. I'd been terrified in that basement, never mind before I got my powers. Right now, though, those criminal elements seemed like just another annoyance to deal with, another complication to account for. Online, a fair amount of people thought I was a relatively experienced cape, while some other people believed I was a gang member myself. Either one of those beliefs could explain the ice in my veins. It was an unnerving thought, but results were results. Panic wasn't going to help anyone.

For a moment I had the impulse to ignore all the pesky doubts that plagued my mind, to go with the flow, to see where events would take me. The urge left as soon as it came, and I wondered what the old me would have thought about it. She would have been caught up in her fear, I figured. She would have been careful, perhaps to the point of paralysis. But I'd spent weeks stuck in that vicious cycle with Emma and the others, so I knew staying in one place was hardly a good way to approach this kind of situation. I fetched my notebook, jotting down a few quick things about my state of mind - I felt _different_, which seemed significant. Lisa would want to know about that.

I knew my confidence was power-induced, but I couldn't resent its presence. It was something I'd lacked for so long that I'd forgotten what it felt like, and it got me out of the door, got me on my feet. I'd been given power, and I'd been granted the agency to use it. In a way, hadn't I'd gotten everything I'd ever wished for?

Be careful what you wish for, I suppose.

...Now there was a thought.

I opened up PHO, browsing to a section I'd once enjoyed, though I hadn't visited it in years. Squirreled away in Off-Topic Discussions, frequented by a lot of trolls and other unseemly denizens of the internet, there was the Wishlist. Corny and frequently filled with bad memes, it had somehow avoided the banhammer.

_Welcome to the Wishlist, Amalgam! If you could have any parahuman power, what would it be, and why? Be creative!_

Time to put some effort in.

Tonight I'd do research, and figure out my options. Tomorrow I'd fetch Alec and figure out what the hell had changed with my aura. After that… after that I'd make a decision about my future, and follow through with it. Maybe I'd settle on a power, or join the Undersiders, or call the PRT. Something. Maybe I'd even consider Charlotte's suggestions, even if they sounded completely weird to me. I'd already followed a bunch of supervillains into their spooky underground lair, _twice_, so calling a helpline or having a weird incognito conversation with a therapist seemed like rather minor leaps of faith at this point.

I tried to ignore the queasy feeling in my stomach, and the feeling that maybe it was high time indulge in all those panic attacks I'd been ruthlessly suppressing with all the self-control of someone under the influence of their own semi-benevolent mind-control powers. No. I _refused_. Deep breaths. Eyes forward. This was _my _power, _my _screwed-up head, _my _screwed-up life. I owned it. I didn't really _care _if it was my power that gave me such conviction - just that I had it now. I'd put it to good use.

Spark of green and black suddenly flickered between my fingers, and I smiled.

* * *

**Adler: **Are you ever gonna give me my answer?

**Unknown Number: **Sure.

**Unknown Number: **I found your bitch.


End file.
